Souled [Editing]

Chapter 28

Nate was at Meredith's door before she could ever rethink the call she made. In her buzzed, or slightly more leaning on tipsy drunk, state she called him. She knew, knew, it was a bad idea. It was wholly terrible for her to have him come over when she wasn't sober. Her inhibitions were lowered which meant her defenses were weaker. Still, she couldn't not answer the door when Nate was standing on the other side of it.

Pulling open the door, Meredith got the first good look at Nate since she left his apartment. When she saw him the day before, she was too angry to really take him in the way she wanted to. Now all she wanted to do was stare at him. So she did.

His hair was damp for some reason unbeknownst to her. Blue eyes pierced her to where she stood. She forgot how much she loved his eyes. Those eyes that were gentle and kind in the dark. Those eyes that were sad and desperate as she walked away. Those eyes that were now curious and cautious. He had a five o'clock shadow and his eyes still had smudges underneath them. Her eyes trailed down his body. His clothes were casual, a t-shirt and jeans. She remembered those jeans on the floor and his shirt tossed on the other side of the room. Hands that were gentle and knew all the right places to go.

Meredith's thoughts went to a bad place. A place she didn't want to trail down to just yet, but her mind was already there. Her face was getting hot. The room was getting hot. The cool evening breeze from the open front door was welcome.

"Meredith?" Nate said. "Are you okay?"

Meredith snapped back to reality. She had lost her train of thought...a train of thought she so desperately wanted to hop back on. "Yeah. I'm fine. Good, even." She fanned her face. She was still burning up.

His eyes scanned her face. "Have you been drinking?"

"What? That's ridiculous."

Nate raised an eyebrow as Meredith let him in. He looked at the empty bottle of wine on the counter in the kitchen and the glass on the coffee table in the living room. "You have. Are you sure you want to do this tonight?"

"Yes. I don't want to lose my nerve." Why did she say that?

"Okay then. Let's talk." Nate sat down in the arm chair and crossed one leg over the other.

Meredith curled up in the corner of the couch opposite of him. Her hands were starting to shake. "You look tired," she commented to fill the silence growing between them.

"So do you." Nate's eyes softened as he gazed into hers.

She was tired, she thought. So very tired of fighting what she wanted to do.

"I haven't been able to sleep since—" Since we got back, is what she didn't say. But the look in Nate's eyes told her that he understood even if she cut off midway through the sentence.

"About that night," he began, "it's just a misunderstanding and I want to tell you the whole story."

"So you've said before. What's the whole story then, Nate?"

He took a deep breath and put together his thoughts. "I just want you to know I wasn't with her when we left for Dee's graduation. I ended whatever it was before."

"So you were with her then." That was all she needed. Confirmation that he had betrayed her trust. She felt ill again. Having this conversation after having a few glasses of wine was not a good idea.

"Yes," he confessed finally. "But things changed and I stopped it."

"How? How did things change?"