Suicide

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Dear Alex,
Approximately 1 million people commit suicide every year, that's about one death every 40 seconds or a total of 3,000 people each day.
Why did you have to be one of those people?
For every one individual who manages to take their life about 20 others attempt and fail.
Why couldn't you have been one of those twenty? Why'd you have to go?
It sucks nobody realizes how much I talked to you or how important you were. But I'll keep smiling like everything's okay because that's what I do. I smile and laugh, I pretend like I don't have a care in the world. People believe it too. And sure everything is fine until I sit down and think about you and how you're gone. Like now... you know I still stay awake until 3 am waiting for your late night text with one simple word: "help."
I can't stop myself from believing it's all my fault. If I would've told someone... but who? If I would've stayed awake that night maybe you would've stuck around? It's funny I fell asleep that night and now I can't sleep. Not anymore. I'm so sorry.

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