What I never knew I always wanted (Robsten story) -ON HOLD

The Hauntings Of Our Past

It had been a month since Eliana had been admitted to the ward. Rob and Kristen would visit her whenever they were permitted. To them, it didn't seem like it was doing any good. Eliana only seemed more depressed every time they would visit.

They had her on a couple medications that to Kristen, was making Eliana worse. She was slowly turning into someone that Kristen didn't know. This was De Ja Vu all over again but instead, this time it was her daughter and not her.

They both hated seeing their daughter like this, Rob was also curious about Kristen. She seemed more fiercely protective of Eliana, he didn't know how to describe it. But he shook it off, not thinking too hard about it. Little did he know, the demons she was hiding from him.

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"Mom?" Eliana's voice came into the phone. It was obvious she was crying.

"Hey, Hun."

"I need to come home, I'm just getting worse and I don't even know who I am anymore. These meds they have me on are making me worse."

"I know honey, I can see it. Your dad won't let me pull you out of there otherwise I would in a heartbeat."

"All we do is art projects and group therapy. How the hell is that suppose to help me? They put me on another med, a sedative at night. A fucking sedative, that induces the nightmares I've been trying to get away from. I haven't been sleeping barely at all so that's why they started that."

"Without our permission?"

"They said dad signed it."

Kristen was livid that Robert would go behind her back.

"Had one girl here say I should forget my son, he wasn't here long so I couldn't have gotten that attached. He was my fucking son!"

"Eliana honey, I know. I'm going to talk to your dad tonight and I'm going to do everything in my power to get you out of there. You need to be home, I think you would benefit in the same ways I did."

"I love you, mom...."

"I love you too honey, be good and ill be there tomorrow to see you if I get approved by your nurse in the morning."

"Ok...I gotta go, they are calling dinner."

"Ok night love"

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"Rob, we cant just leave her there. She is miserable and turning into someone who is not our daughter."

"Kristen, you know it will help."

"These meds they have her on is messing her up. I know they didn't help me when I was going through the same thing, time and compassion helped...." Kristen froze realizing what she had said.

"What?" Rob asked.

Kristen sighed and sat down on the couch. She rubbed her face with her hands knowing she couldn't escape this now.

"There is something I never told you..." she whispered.

Rob took a seat on the couch.

"What?"

"Eliana is technically my 2nd child."

"What do you mean? You are scaring me right now Kris."

"I was pregnant. It was before I met you, Rob."

"What happened?"

Kristen sighed. "I was 17, you know who I was with at that time."

"Michael?"

"Yeah, anyway long story short I got pregnant. Everything was fine with the pregnancy, perfect even. I found out I was having a boy and was looking forward to being a mom. Our relationship wasn't perfect, we fought and he drank but it was never physical...until that night." Kristen's voice cracked as tears sprang to her eyes. This was not at all easy to talk about.

"Continue when you are ready sweetheart" Rob soothed. Not sure he wanted to hear the rest of it.

"He came home drunk, I was about 7 almost 8 months pregnant at that point. He came into the bedroom and started yelling at me, calling me a whore and what not. I don't want to go into too much detail but it resulted in him continuously kicking me in the stomach as I tried to protect our son. Next thing I know I'm laying in a pool of blood, I went unconscious. I woke up in the hospital alone with a nurse telling me I had delivered my son but he had died. Worst moment of my life. I stayed with Michael for god knows what reasons. Twilight happened 3 months later, I met you and dumped him and here we are...."

"The nightmares you were having during that time. Those were about that night weren't they?"

"Yeah,"

"You should tell Eliana, let her know you know what its like."

"I did, that day in the emergency room when we were alone. I told her not to tell you."

"But why didn't you want me to know? That's what I don't understand Kristen"

"I don't know, I don't like talking about it and I didn't want it to change how you see me. I love you."

Rob took Kristen into his arms, feeling her tears against his neck.

"It could never, I love you so much."

"That's why I was uneasy during my pregnancy with Eliana. Doctors were not sure I could carry a pregnancy after the trauma my body had endured."

"I love you, sweetheart,"

Going to bed that night, the nightmares haunted Kristen again. She had not had them in years but they had come back full force. Robert was woken up by screaming and the bed shaking.

He opened his eyes and saw the Kristen was tossing back and force as sweat dripped down her body.

"Kristen, wake up honey" Rob soothed as he pulled her into his arms. "Your ok hun."

Kristen pushed him and gave out another scream before opening her eyes. Her breathes were raw and jagged as she realized where she was. She fell back against him and broke.

"Its ok Kris, everything is alright hun."

"It felt so real, I was reliving it all over again" she cried.

"I know hun, everything will be alright." He sat on the bed rocking her in his arms, repeatedly kissing her head. He was letting her get it all out. He hated that he had not known about her ordeal earlier, but he also couldn't be mad at her. She had wanted to forget about it and now it made sense to him why she had a hard time dealing with Eliana being locked up.

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I wanna clear something up with this chapter, I know you guys are probably wondering why Robert went behind Kristen's back about the medication. He didn't know Kristen's past to him something is wrong with Kristen and he thinks she is just being in another word a momma bear. he thinks he is doing what is best with not letting Kristen have much say about what happens with Eliana, but now that he knows her past. will it change things??? maybe he was going about this the wrong way? we will see.....