My weird dreams and notes (must read it's terrifying)

WE HEARD THE CHORDS

Dear dear my dearest daddy diary,
Today was heavenly. Me and that_one_random_emo heads His chords. The capitalisation on His means ....KEMP. We were casually eating our lunch in the canteen when, suddenly...all hell broke loose. Kemp came wondering in like a flappy, flocculent pubic haired train and sat down at the elders table, eating his kiddy meal. He had a juice cartoon which looked really sweet. Wait. That sounds sexual. Oh well. Anyway, me and that_one_random_emo were watching the grey haired dolphin eat his lunch, when suddenly he rose above all. He was so graceful, like a senile ballerina on wobbly dick stilts. As he rose, he stuck his slobbery tongue out his mouth and smiled like an insanely dark brown tabby cat. (Predictions made that up) He started his long, suctioning journey back to the bins to empty his tray out. Since we sat right next to the bins his belly gently rubbed Ella's (that_one_random_emos) shoulder. Then, everything became true heaven. A young kiddy said hello to him and he replied in a deep, meowing voice:
"HELLO." and everything died.
His chords gently caressed our necks as he spilt the sexual words out of his mouth like sticky toffee grey skinned women. And that's it. He slowly made his way back to his lair to continue his research on How to Tame a Chaplin. Thank you for reading this insane diary.