My weird dreams and notes (must read it's terrifying)

Kemps abyss of children fondling

20th November 2017,
Okay so basically this was the best day ever. Oh god. Where to start....SO.
The day started off with me and my bff (that_one_random_emo) walking casually into school and luckily Bentleys olfactory(nasal chamber) glands where not awaiting. We had a perfectly normal start to the day but by break time everything started to turn to hell, unsurprisingly. We had come up with a master mind plan to leave my pen behind in Kemp's classroom so we could venture up and retrieve it, while hearing his gleeful chords ring out seductively. When I entered the classroom, I called out politely:
"SIR."
The shoelace replied with a deep, satanic "YES?!"
"I think I've left my pen in here."
"Come In kiddy (he didn't actually say that)."
I entered and begun searching round while glancing hysterically at meh bff. I was trying not to die, but my snorting chords begun to seep through and I started smiling and snuffling uncontrollably. Then. Kemp started to smile too. It was slow and subtle at first, but then he suddenly turned his head towards where Ella was dying and grinned really creepily. That was it. Kemp offered me a new pen but I declined and exited as quickly as possible, meeting my dying best friend outside. She looked like a bright red, meowing, inflated, crooning hippopotamus belly. WHAT. Soon, the bell went and I had science. I was just entering the classroom, when I realised Hancock was nowhere to be seen. Instead, Edward was standing in front of the door like an ominous senile cat. I felt myself shiver with terror, and as I walked past my body had a random spaz attack and I accidentally caressed Edwards belly. Or was it his dick? Who knows. All I know is that I was very embarrassed and so was Edward- he mumbled quietly at me "EXCUSE ME?" but I ignored his angry spleen and quickly evacuated.

Then. It was lunchtime. Oh dear oh dear oh dear. So, the senile friend of mine was waiting seductively right next to Kemp's table with her lunch. I saw her head bobbing above the abyss of kids and couldn't hold my laughter in, as I realised the shoelace was right behind her, flirting with some blonde 30 year olds. What a possessive crooning dildo. WHAT. anyway, I sat down calmly and we quickly switched to even nearer the shoelace. We were quivering with excitement as we heard his gentle voice ringing eagerly in the distance, like a low, seductive daddy ankle. Um what. Suddenly, Edward approached. He marched forward, and suddenly....he looked down. He looked directly at that_one_random_emo and smiled very scarily at her, like an insanely, ill flavoured cock giver. What is my iPad doing. We erupted into fits of inevitable laughter, but soon calmed down and saw Bentley approaching. HMMM WHAT COULD POSSIBLY HAPPEN WITH DEAR DADDY BENTLES?? Well. The answer is anything. Bentley was lining up for his daily doggy dinner, and he disappeared behind the rows of ancient machinery. that_one_random_emo was star8ng at him intently, when suddenly his head went POP and poked out from behind the machinery, like a popping proboscis (look it up you won't regret it) anal cavity. We died. Almightily died. And that's basically it.

Oh and Daddy Dalaba was feeling very seductive today in Maths.

FAREWELL KIDS.