Spiral

【and left for space】

Now I sit lonely in a masochistic silence with nobody around me. I'm in a room full of people, but they're not there. They never will be no matter how hard I try to get their attention to reach my aching body. No matter how much my voice breaks when I ask for assistance, not a lash will be bat in the direction of a sad girl.

It's like space. I glide across the surface of the moon with the serenity of god and silence while the end of the world happens at a fingertips distance from my eyes. I am a dying star and he is made of stars; they run through his veins and slip out from his tongue when he leaves pecks on her cheeks and whispers small affections that my ears would gladly trade their hearing ability forever if only to hear once more before they became nothing.

I am an ever expanding mass of nothing and I can't let him in. He is a supernova with the power to destroy me and I have already been gone. Who will pollinate my garden on the moon? Will they bring me flowers?

I see him with so many new girls leeching off of his arm and I worry as if I were still an ember in his hearth. In the end, I know deep in the back of my mind he is replacing me, but it crawls down into my chest and expands in grotesque claws and tells me how easy it is to replace such a despicable human.

I feel nothing anymore. He pickpocketed my emotions with him when he walked past me with his hand in hers. That's okay, though. This just feels like hell has risen to earth. I'm okay.

I'll be okay.

I won't scream until my throat bleeds.

I won't cry until I can't breathe.

I'll be okay because he's happy.

I

don't

need

him

a n y m o r e.

Please stay! I'll give you my space suit...