"Who are you tryna be son? Another version of me or a better version of yourself?"
In which the acceptance of a scholarship is able to alter the life of Jabari including the many people he thought were his friends.
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"YOU THINK I'M GONNA GO EASY ON YOU CAUSE I'M YOUR OLD MAN HUH?" ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬
The court grew far from quiet as the voice of my overbearing father bellowed amongst the pattering of our sneakers upon the damp pavement. At this point in time I was unable to decipher the sweat that was rippling across my face from the never ending droplets of rain that constantly fell from the dark uneasy sky. I was cold and tired which wasn't the best mix but I was determined to beat my father in his own game. The game of basketball that he was willing to share with me despite my young age. He usually teased me about my height but I hadn't cared, I had game and that's all that mattered. Plus I'm only twelve... and a half so there's no way I'm gonna be this height forever.
"What are you thinking about Jabari! Keep your head on the damn game and don't let me catch them eyes on the ground, you hear me?" My father snapped, grasping my attention with his speech when he could've easily stole the ball from me seeing that I began to zone out at the thought of me growing to be about six feet in five years max.
"Bari, Bari! Hurry up! I wanna go inside!" My little brother shouted out unexpectedly causing me to turn in his direction as he watched us play intently as he held onto the black umbrella as if his life depended on it. Unfortunately for him it would probably be a while until he was finally able to enter our apartment building seeing that he couldn't be inside unattended and my dad and I were too engulfed in our own little world that I had no chance of escaping until we finished what we came out her for in the first place.
"Look over here Bari damn! You know what hold it." My dad yelped as he finally grabbed the ball away from me. My mind flustered as I slowly backed away from him as his stare intensified causing me to feel quite embarrassed although it were just us three out in the park. I despised the fact that Jacoby has to deliberately watch the altercation that was bound to happen in a matter of seconds but there was no way of escaping the superior male who stood before me. I'm quite prideful when it came to my game but for some reason I always managed to turn into butter under my father's gaze. Lord knows just how much I hated to disappoint him and myself. He never failed to tell me and I quote 'you're the clay and I'm the potter and don't you forget that' before our many practices. He wanted me to be as good as him so that maybe I could become what he never became and that was a star. I could never allow myself to forget that I'm the clay and he was the potter. He was molding me. Making something out of nothing. Allowing me to become the better version of myself. Most importantly I couldn't let my mistakes be seen as his own. He's made his own faults under the eyes of the Lord but he looked at me as if I were the prodigal son. The one that could right all his wrongs but even little Jacoby knew that wasn't possible, we both knew our father wasn't anyone to mess with and it's a blessing that he even got to keep me and him after my mothers unfortunate demise.
"Sorry dad, I just got distracted!" I finally allowed the words to roll off of my tongue as I took notice of my father growing quite frustrated with me. Abruptly he neared closer to me instantly gripping his ebony colored hands atop of my shoulders. His hands clenched the cotton material of my large black hoodie that draped over my boyish body accompanied by the black and white basketball shorts that I frequently wore on nights like this.
"Look at me!" He shouted right in front of my face but I made sure to keep my composure. "I'm the potter, you're the clay. Your mistakes are mine." He stated his famous quote as I could hear Jacoby screeching at the sight. We all knew just how much he hated to watch me get yelled at. I was his older brother for gods sake, he practically worshipped the ground I walked on and for him to witness me coming to a fault with my father basically hurt him more than it did me. "You see that, J? Now you got your brother out here crying cause you out here acting stupid! Show me what you can do son! You don't see no other little boys out here working they ass off! While they sleeping what you out here doing? Working! But if you wanna be a star you better know why the hell you working." He firmly stated as he walked in the direction of my brother.
"I wouldn't even be out here if it weren't for you always down my back! You're killing me out here just so I could live up to the dream that your lazy ass left unfulfilled!" I slightly mumbled but to my misfortune he heard the unkind words.
And with that being said... I knew my ass was grass.
"The fuck you just said to me Jabari? Huh? You wanna say it a little louder for me?" He swore as he trekked in my direction once again as he still held the ball between his arm and side. "Come on Jabari repeat yourself!" He requested a bit harsher than before as the rain seemed to fall harder than before. I damn sure wasn't gonna repeat myself but I was gonna let him know how I felt.
"Since you're the potter and I'm the clay you're basically making me into what you see fit! You're making me into you! I shouted as I showcased my frustration by emphasizing my words with my hand and arm movements as if it were choreographed. "I wanna be a star but I don't want to be you!"
"I'm not making you into me Jabari. Who the fuck went off and told you I love myself so damn much, that I'd want to have another version of me running around the hood. Shit I don't want you to be me, I want your lil ass to be better than me!" He rambled on, eventually coming into my presence as he pounded his finger into my chest. As every second passed my wish of altering the words that previously spewed from my mouth grew into a prayer that he would magically forget what I said but I knew all too well that that wasn't gonna happen. "It'll be a damn shame if I allowed you to become who I am! You'll be just another nigga with a two bedroom apartment in the fucking projects! Is that what you want?"
"No." I whimpered just above a whisper as I adverted my eyes unto his own.
"Now I didn't think so. Get your shit and let's go fore your brother catch a cold." I did as told as I mentally thanked the lord for not allowing my father to lay another hand on me. I grabbed my blue drawstring backpack that previously rested on the damp pavement and I trekked behind my father towards the exit of the park. Jacoby quickly followed suit as he ran over beside me pulling me into a side embrace. I looked down to his short stature as he held tightly unto my torso as we walked in the darkness. I took the umbrella from his hand allowing us to both be able to prevent contact with the rain.
"Good job today Bari." My ten year old brother reassured me as expected. I smirked slightly showing my appreciation as we still trekked through the rain.
"Don't be lying to your brother like that Coby. His ass needs to learn to pay attention." Our father butted in to our conversation as he guided us across the street towards our downcast neighborhood. I grew agitated but I wasn't intending to hear another one of his speeches or even catch his hands so I decided to not say a word and by me doing that caused Jacoby to do the same although we all knew his opinion hadn't changed. I was the greatest twelve year old he ever knew and nothing my father ever had to say could change that. I was the greatest twelve year old he ever knew too.
But I wanted to be the greatest ball player they ever knew. I wanted to be all that and more. I wanted to be the best. I wanted to be the first one to make it out of the hood. I wanted to be the best on the court.
