SATURN | PHILKAS ONE SHOTS

beaten and bruised

a/n: i might actually continue writing philkas. we'll see.

pairing: philip shea x lukas waldenbeck
fandom: eyewitness
word count: 1001
prompt: philip and lukas discuss their traumas.
* they are dating in this and, like in the show, it is a secret.
warnings: language, sensitive subjects (past abuse, parental abuse)

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It wasn't a surprise that Lukas had shown up below Philip's window at 10PM on a Friday. It had happened on so many occasions that Philip had grown familiar with the reasonings behind his visits and figured this was his usual "I can't sleep in the same house as my dad, can I stay here tonight?" nights. Philip sat at his computer, editing the most recent video footage of one of Lukas's jumps from the day before when the first pebble hit the glass. He walked over and unlocked the window, gripping the edge and forcing it open, waving the other teen up.

The way he stood on the lawn caused Philip to wonder as he saved the progress he had made and shut the program down, going to sit on his bed. He sat cross-legged and waited, listening to rustle of the leaves as Lukas climbed up the tree just outside his window. He sat in the silence for a few more seconds before Lukas tumbled in through the space of the open window, gangly limbs causing him to trip. Philip found himself chuckling under his breath.

"Jesus, Lukas. Helen and Gabe are downst–" He cut his sentence short when Lukas stood up, the moonlight capturing every detail of his face, including the purple and blue marks that meshed together on his right cheek, just below his eye, over his cheekbone, and along the bridge of his nose. "Oh my God, what happened?"

"I told him." Lukas whispered into the darkness, sounding quieter than Philip had ever heard him speak before. "I told my dad... about us. Told him that I'm," Lukas paused, taking in a sharp, jagged breath, body shuddering like he had been crying or close to it. "That I'm–" Philip reached out and carefully placed his hand on Lukas arm, rubbing soothing circles into the skin that he'd left exposed. His arms were inclement in Philip's room, which came as no surprise to the younger teen. It was the coldest night of the year and Lukas seemed to have walked there without a coat.

"He hit you?" Philip asked quietly as if scared to raise his voice higher that one octave. Lukas, frozen in his spot, nodded and closed his eyes. It was then that Philip noticed the wet tracks on his cheeks. "I'll kill him." Philip swore into the night, taking Lukas's hand in his and pulling him to his bed. He sat down on the mattress while Philip grabbed a stray blanket from the floor and secured it around his boyfriend's shoulders. Lukas turned around in the darkness, frantic eyes scanning the room.

"I didn't think he would react this way." Lukas's voice rings fragile in the average room. Philip moves and allows Lukas to lay down in his bed, pulling the rumpled comforter out from beneath the other boy's legs and pulling it up to Lukas's chin before climbing in himself. Lukas rolled onto his side, balled up with his knees locked behind his linked fingers. When he registered the shift in the mattress Lukas found the strength within himself to roll over and face the boy he loves. "I know if my mom was still here she wouldn't treat me like shit. Sometimes I like to think that if she was still alive, maybe my dad wouldn't act like such a monster... maybe I'm just delusional." Philip ran his fingers through Lukas' hair, dragging his fingertips down his back in soothing movements.

"Y'know, I've been where you are," Philip said gingerly as Lukas buried his cheek into Philip's clothed chest, breathing him in, the scent of mint and cheap cologne. "My mom used to have these boyfriends. Some of them were nice, others not so much. But there was only one that stuck. His name was Anthony." Lukas nodded against Philip's shirt and pulled back slightly, looking up into the other boy's eyes even though Philip's were trained on the wall. "Whenever my mom decided she was done with Anthony, he would get drunk and find his way back to our apartment. He had these fits of anger and he used to take it out on me."

"He hit you too?" Lukas asked tenderly, sliding up slightly to reach Philip's gaze. The latter nodded numbly.

"Yeah. I never told my mom about it though, I just assumed it would go away with time. Anthony was always too drunk to remember anything anyway, so I knew if I brought it up he would deny it." Philip took in a shaky breath and caught Lukas's gaze. He touched their foreheads together and closed his eyes. When he opened them back up, Lukas was staring at him with such open vulnerability he felt so unbelievably angry. No one should ever be allowed to cause him this much pain, he thought to himself. Lukas leaned in closer and captured Philip's lips for one second (or two seconds at the most) and smiled grievously.

"I believe you." Lukas whispered and Philip felt his chest tighten with guilt because it should've been the other way around, right? Philip was meant to comfort Lukas.

"What was your mom like?" Philip asked, desperate to take his mind off Philip since that wasn't what he intended with his story.

"From what I remember she was really nice, and pretty. She had really pretty brown eyes, kinda like yours." Lukas cracked a smile and closed his eyes, yawning and covering his mouth with his hand. Philip felt his heart flutter and pressed a light kiss to the top of Lukas's nose that still felt a little cold. "She was just really amazing, I wish she was still here. She would have loved you, I know it." Philip smiled at that and rose a hand up to caress the other teens cheek, his touch featherlight over the bruises that blossomed on his cheekbone.

"I love you." Philip whispered, threading his fingers back into Lukas hair, gently lulling the boy the sleep.

"Love you, too."