To Be a DC Superhero [septiplier version]

M a y o n n a i s e

As I was using my phone in my room, listening to my music through my headphones, I heard a really loud knock.

I looked around only to realize that the guy next door held a note up.

'Hi.'

I got my own note and wrote quickly.

'Erm ... hello?'

Then he wrote back with another piece of paper.

'Do you want to get to know each other?'

I raised an eyebrow.

'Why?'

'Because we're neighbors and you're the same age as me.'

'How do you know my age?'

'I don't. But judging by your physical appearance you look eighteen.'

'I'm seventeen.'

'Close enough ... '

'Anyways. You're eighteen. Why are you that muscular?'

'Because I go to the gym?'

'At eighteen?! Stop.'

'Stop what?'

'Going to the gym!'

'Lol why?'

'YOU'RE ONLY EIGHTEEN!'

'Okay ... '

'Do you know Mark?'

'Mark who?'

'Fischbach?'

'Erm—no. Why?'

'What were you doing yesterday night?'

'I was playing video games.'

'Ok ... '

'Why do you ask?'

'Cuz I wanna know if you're gonna lie ... and you did. Yesterday night the window curtain wasn't all the way down, and if you were playing video games I would've seen light not on the floor, but I didn't."

'What are you talking about?'

'What's you're name?'

'my name?'

'Make it quick!'

'Matthias.'

'Don't lie, again. Your subway cap is under your bed.'

'That's my friend's.'

'Stop lying! I know who you are now. I'm not as clueless as I was before, thanks to you.'

'What do you mean???'

'You work at Subway and answer the phone for people to order their sandwiches. You stayed up late last night talking to me ... you're the one I call 'Batman.'  you're Mark Fischbach ... '