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get to know: ben and ariel

lowercase intended.

the penthouse.

ariel's pov

I sat on the bed in Ben and I's shared room and flipped through the pages of a scrapbook we made on our anniversary last year. I smiled remembering all of our memories in the three years we've been together. The good and the bad. my smile slowly fell into a frown when I came across an ultrasound picture of our unborn son. I gently picked it up and stared at it for a while before I felt a tear fall from my eye and land on the photo.

flashback: november 2015

I rubbed my hand over my protruding belly and smiled while looking in the mirror. I saw Ben come behind me and kiss my cheek making my smile get wider.

"I can't wait until he gets here." Ben mumbled in my ear and he stood behind me resting his hands on my stomach as well.

"and how are you sure it's a boy?" I said, quirking an eyebrow and looking at him. He chuckled and shrugged.

"I have a gut feeling it's a boy." he said, smirking. I giggled and turned around in his arms.

"well we'll find out tomorrow if your gut feeling is right or not." I said. I puckered my lips and he leaned down and pressed his to mine. I rested my head on his chest and smiled in content.

I felt my hands start shaking and I got off the bed and walked in front of the mirror. when I looked, the reflection I saw was my pregnant belly and then blood: a whole lot of blood. I fell to my knees and started bawling. it was happening again: my pain was coming back to haunt me and I don't know how to handle it.

ben's pov

I walked into our shared penthouse and dropped my practice bags on the floor.

"babe, i'm home." I called out. all I heard was sobbing and that was enough for me to quickly rush up the stairs and into our bedroom. I saw her sitting in the corner of the room with her knees up to her chest and crying. I quickly went to her side and kneeled down in front of her. she looked up at me and frowned even more.

"i'm sorry Ben." she said through her tears. I shook my head, confused.

"what are you sorry for baby, what happened?" I asked. she held up a picture of the ultrasound of our unborn son and I closed my eyes and sighed quietly.

"come on, get up for me." I said, helping her up. I laid her into the bed and laid down next to her. she continued to sob and I pulled her closer to me.

"i'm so so sorry, Ben. I couldn't carry our child, this is all my fault." she said through her sobs. hearing her say that broke my heart.

has she always felt this way?

"shh, stop it. it's not your fault. don't say that and stop apologizing." I said trying to back my own tears from falling.

flashback: december 2015

since the loss of our baby, the mood has been solemn. no smiles, no laughter, no excitement, nothing. as bad as this hurts me, the toll it's taking on ariel hurts my heart.

"baby?" I called out as I walked downstairs into the living room. she was sitting on the couch, wrapped in a blanket and holding a sheet of paper in her hand. when I walked closer to her, it was the death certificate of jaden, our unborn. I got upset and snatched it out of her hand.

"stop doing this to yourself, ari!" I yelled. she stood up and tried to grab it back.

"give it back, ben!"

"no! you're gonna make yourself go crazy if you keep doing this!" I yelled, holding it up high so she couldn't reach it. she gave me a cold stare.

"leave me alone." she said, trying to push past me. I grabbed her arm before she could go anywhere and pulled her back.

"stop it. you got it backwards if you think i'm going to sit here and watch you make yourself go into a black hole over this. it's been over a month and you haven't even left the house. you can't stay in here forever."

"let me go."

"no."

"benjamin, I said, let me go!" she yelled, snatching away from me. she looked at me and started tearing up.

"why aren't you affected by this!? I haven't seen you cry not once! not even a tear! you haven't sulked, you haven't gotten sad, nothing!" she yelled.

"because I have to stay strong for you! you don't think this affects me!? you don't think i'm sad about this?! you don't think this shit hurts me as much as it hurts you?! he was my son! jaden! jaden amir simmons! I didn't even get a chance to look in his eyes! to hold him, hold his hands, protect him, teach him basketball, nothing! you don't think this hurts me?!" I yelled back in disbelief, feeling myself start to break down. she stood there quiet as tears streamed down her face.

"that was... he was my kid. mine and I didn't even get to meet him, tell him I love him.. I didn't get to say goodbye." I said between my tears, I sat down on the couch and held my face in my hands, letting it all sink in. I felt ariel sit next to me and her small hands held mine and removed them from my face. she looked at me and didn't say anything, just pulled me into hug.

and for the first time, I let all my emotions out.

I heard her crying die down and I looked at her to see she was fast asleep. I sighed quietly and ran my hand down my face and wiped the unfallen tears away. two years later and it still affects her like this? there's more going on with her that I don't know about.

and I plan on getting to the roots of it.

•••

just an inside look 👀

najai and algee up next.