Best Of Me

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"So, I... I just wanted to apologise-" Jimin stammers nervously, "-for being such a piece of shit to you when you just wanted the best for the both of us. I was being super selfish by shutting myself and refusing to let you in to discuss about it properly. Even Tae was telling me about what asshole I was being.  I'm sorry for lying to you and taking so long to actually talk to you about this cause I was just... scared, I guess? I don't know how to explain myself without sounding like an asshole, so I understand if you don't wanna-"

He heaves a shaky breath, the skin around his knuckles turning white as he twists and turns his fingers around each other in his lap.

"If you don't wanna ever talk to me or see me again."

There's a stark silence between the both of them afterwards, Jungkook's expression close to unnerving as his eyes continue boring holes into Jimin. Jimin squirms under the intensity of his gaze, flitting his eyes downwards as he howls with regret in his mind, regretting actually giving Jungkook a choice because there is actually a very high chance the alpha will leave him given that he's been such an asshole and who would actually want to date him? An emotionally turbulent person riddled with mental traumas. Not him that's for sure-

"You know," Jungkook starts, scratching at the back of his neck, "I was really pissed that day. In my mind, I only wanted us to mate cause I'd heard of so many bad consequences of soulmates not mating. But you couldn't see that and even accused me of just wanting to do that for sex, like how ridiculous is that? And I was literally just struggling to live properly for the next few days because all I could do was think about you- like I was so worried about how you were coping with all of these since Taehyung told me about you. I got angier with myself, like there was a possibility you didn't love me anymore and here I was worrying like a fool."

"I'm sorry, Jungkook, I really am-"

Jimin stops in the midst of his sentence when Jungkook shakes his head earnestly, a genuinely baffled expression splayed out on his face.

"Jungkook?"

"It wasn't till a few days ago that I realised that maybe I had a hand in our argument as well. I feel like this whole issue happened because we were rushing things? And I kept pressing you to mate even though I knew you had a trauma about mating. I'm sorry too hyung, for pushing you too hard."

Jimin doesn't realise that he's crying until something wet splashes onto his hands in his lap. Jungkook senses this as well, alarmed as he scooches over to Jimin, the wooden chair he's perching on drawing a few annoyed tsks from the students huddled in the cafe studying as it screeches loudly as he drags it across the tiled floor.

Strong and reassuring arms pull Jimin's shivering body towards a warm and sturdy chest, cradling his head as Jungkook pats at his back gently.

You know how people say that relationships are all about give and take? Jimin's heart wrenches painfully in guilt as he realises that Jungkook's been the one giving the whole time without any request except for his devotion, and he's been taking, taking and taking like the selfish person he's been. Jimin doesn't understand how the alpha's still such an angel despite the situation, when he could've just thrown Jimin aside without a second thought and moved on. He doesn't deserve Jungkook. He really doesn't.

"Why are you so good to me? Why are you so-"

Jungkook only smiles as he caresses Jimin's hair lightly.

"It's because I love you," He says gently and Jimin's heart flutters and does little jumps of joy uncontrollably.

"But I was horrible and-"

"I know," Jungkook sighs, "But Jimin, don't you realise? We're only human and humans make mistakes all the time. It's okay as long as you learn from them."

"So does this mean..."

"Yes."

Jungkook smiles that adorable smile of his, bunny teeth on full display for Jimin. Jimin pulls back, still sniffling and Jungkook cooes, handing him tissues to wipe away his tears.

"Although we should probably start slow and do it properly this time," Jungkook muses, "Park Jimin, would you like to go out for dinner so we can get to know each other better?"

"You're such an idiot," Jimin wails, fresh sobs wracking his body and he holds onto Jungkook, gripping tightly onto his shirt.

"An idiot for you," Jungkook murmurs under his breath, an affectionate smile gracing his features as he chooses to ignore how wet his shirt's getting under Jimin's tears.

It isn't till half an hour later that Jimin manages to fully compose himself (except for his obviously puffy eyes) and Jungkook herds him out of the cafe with a warm arm wound securely around his shoulder.

They both automatically make a beeline towards the nearest eatery, which so happens to be a small soup shop located directly opposite the university grounds. It's small and cosy, not really crowded at this hour, and they're both starving so Jungkook figures, why not? Jimin readily agrees and leans into him, curling his fingers around Jungkook's waist, humming happily under his breath.

And it isn't till when they're halfway through their meal that Jimin finally speaks up with a serious expression on his face.

"I'll tell you everything."

His words catches Jungkook off-guard, who almost chokes on his ginseng chicken soup mid slurp, and Jimin can't help but giggle at the comical expressions his alpha unintentionally makes.

"What?"

"You know, about why I'm so scared about mating and everything."

"You sure?" Jungkook eyes him, concerned "I don't want to rush things."

Jimin nods earnestly, his black bangs flopping up and down cutely with every bop of his head.

"Yep. Jungkook, you deserve to know everything."

Jungkook, you deserve the world.

His heart warms as Jungkook's eyes crinkle into small crescents and he leans forward attentively, arms resting on his strong thighs.

"I'm all ears."

(unedited)

A/N: Of course i wasn't just going to leave yall with a cliffhanger, i'm not that bad;). i finished this chapter with my favourite playlisy of songs blasting through my earphones so i'm sorry if some parts don't really make sense:/

on a side note, i actually was on track to finish this and the previous chapter mid dec, but then i got writer's block and didn't feel like it was right to publish it cause of jjong's death. i can't put into words how shocking it was and i just remember staring at the reports from twitter on the airport from news outlets and also shawols who were at the hospital then. shinee was one of my first groups and i remember bopping to their songs back then and to have this happen to jonghyun was really saddening and i was just really upset and affected by the whole matter, but i just hope jonghyun's finally at peace now. he lived a tormented life and i hope he's watching over us all from heaven with a smile on his face.

You did well, Jonghyun.


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⏰ Last updated: Dec 28, 2017 ⏰

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