Fervid Desire (Good Pleasure Series #2)

Kabanata 19

Kabanata 19

Sa loob ng tatlong araw ay naging matiwasay naman ang pananatili namin dito sa Nueva Ecija. The people in here were very good and welcoming. And I had lots of fun touring around this province. I had also visited some of the rivers and theme parks. At sa tuwing magkasama kami ni Zach ay nakikita ko kung gaano siya kataas sa pagtingin ng mga tao rito.

I stood on my decision: I will be in blithe now— I won't think other just myself for this time. The thought itself makes me shiver with jolt of excitement. In fact, I was determined to get all the time left to hang out with Zach because I know that after this vacation, we'll reenter to the town we both had grown up, and get back on what we were before. Because I was too paranoid towards what people might reckon to us— especially that they only know that I was with Drook not Zachary Torres.

I closed my eyes as I breathed the fresh breeze of air coming from the huge trees near the river. It was still nine and Zach took me in here. It was my first time to get in here. The river was surrounded with huge Narra Trees, Acacia and so many trees that I barely know. The drastically gushing water that was coming from God knows where, was making the periphery more dramatic. Like some scenes in a romantic movies and of course with the man you are in loved with. Zach was sitting behind me while his both of his legs settled both at my sides, locking me wholly. Ramdam na ramdam ko ang nakakakiliting hininga niya sa aking batok.

My heart hammered my chest making a rattle— I just hope that Zach won't get a chance to hear my pounding heart. I don't know already why I became like this in a sudden. I used to hate him, so much, but now I felt like all my words had been sunk in. Yes, he was exasperating me so much, he was irritative, but all because he was too asshole, he frequently jumped from woman to another— that's why I was so damned irritated with his presence. Irritated— a word that shrouded the real thing called jealousy.

I slowly ran my fingers on his forearms, his veins were popping out, and some of his bristles were moving because of the flow of the air. I like what we were now; Me, sitting between his thighs, and him, sniffing my neck. Like a sweet couple ready to get married. What a word, I thought and I suddenly want to whack myself for another train of thoughts. God, I can't thwart myself from pondering about myself with Zach! But I know, in a mean time, I will make myself bleed because I will leave him, because I'd rather hurt myself now than later. I'd rather choose Drook— who loves me in the first place, than to stick my ass to Zach that was actually only lusting for my body.

I thought I already accepted the fact, but now I slowly repudiate it. I want more that a named of a fuck buddy, but I know it should stay that way. We were not good, we were just in control of our fervid desires. I love him but he was just lusting for my body. I know that, I know him so much. And I can't believe that he was jealous some of the time. He was just being subdued by his ego. Stop assuming, I mentally told myself when I felt that my trance will take me nowhere.

"We'll be going back to Manila tomorrow." nahimigan ko ang malambing niyang panunuya sa aking tainga.

I flinched. God, his effects!

"Babalik ka na ba sa trabaho mo next day?" tanong niyang muli.

I shrugged, ewan ko kung kaya ko pang magsalita gayong hindi na mahinto ang aking puso sa paghuhuramentado.

"Can I drive you to work?" he asked, like he was really free to do it without any complications waiting us there.

"You can't. Maraming makakakita sa atin."

Naramdaman ko ang paghigpit ng hawak niya sa aking baywang. Hinilig ko nalang ang aking katawan at naramdaman ko ang pagbagsak ng aking likod sa kanyang matigas na dibdib.