Taking a Bite Out of the Moons

CH 57: Heart and Body Will Know (Part 2)

FLASHBACK – BEAM'S POV (CONTINUED)

Climbing into Forth's lap, while we're half-dressed sitting in my bed, would be a great idea, if only a mating wasn't attached to it. However, as his lips slide tentatively against mine for our first kiss, the feelings that run through me make me wonder why I'm resisting the idea of mating Forth at all.

"Beam..." kiss, "I'm uhm..." kiss, "not sure..." nibble, "this is..."

Grabbing both sides of Forth's head, I pull back just enough to look at him, "Forth, shut up." I say then pull him back to me and shove my tongue into his mouth to taste him. His light resistance melts away and the kiss quickly turns into a hot melding of mouths and dueling tongues.

My hands want to roam across Forth's chest, but his shirt is in the way. I want to touch his skin and see if it feels as warm and smooth as its always looked. Grabbing the hem of his shirt I start tugging it upwards, trying to get it off his body.

Forth's hands close around my wrists, stilling my movements. "What are you doing?"

"Trying to get your shirt off? Isn't that obvious?" I say teasingly with a smirk.

Instead of smiling, he looks at me an irritated expression, "Beam, you can't play with me like this. You know I can't kiss you and touch you without wanting to claim you."

"What if I'm not playing?" I'm kind of sure I'm not playing around.

"What do you mean?" he asks.

"What if I'm serious?" Am I serious? I think I might be.

"Beam," he growls out my name like a warning, "this is not a game. Mating is a decision that lasts a lifetime, it's not something you can joke about."

Trying to lighten the mood I give him a cheeky smile as I say, "Well, it lasts for your lifetime. It's only a couple hundred years for me." Ok, I meant that as a joke, but he's not laughing. I curse my wayward tongue as I watch anger and sadness replace the beautiful lust that was in his eyes just moments ago.

"You know what, you're a fucking jack ass." He says as he removes me from his lap, pushing me away from him, and standing up, "I don't know maybe you just can't help yourself." He rubs his forehead in frustration and moves towards his clothes, "I'd hoped we'd grown closer over the last two weeks with all the time we've spent talking. I guess it was just me. Maybe I was just fooling myself."

I've liked spending time with him and getting to know him too. I do understand this is important, and not just to him, but to both of us. I just wanted to see him smile. "Forth it was a joke, an awful one, but still a joke. And I've liked talking to you too." He's ignoring me and I'm starting to feel a little worried.

Forth pulls on his jeans, removes my borrowed shirt, and replaces it with his. When he's completely dressed, He looks at me sadly, "I don't think I can do this anymore. Good bye, Beam." He grabs his keys, watch and wallet and moves towards the door.

Wait a minute. What does he mean he can't do this anymore? Why did he say good bye instead of good night? If he leaves now, will he come back? A panicky feeling is settling into the pit of my stomach. I don't want him to go.

I know one way to make him stay, but it requires me making a decision on things I only started contemplating today. Am I ready to make that decision yet? The intense fear pulsing through me warns that if I let him leave now he isn't coming back. At least my mind and heart can both agree that's not acceptable, so I guess that's my answer.