Mark Foster's Pearly Whites (book 2)

The Breakdown

Shit I'm, already so late. How do I mange to be always late?

Finally I see the red neon sign and rush to the main door.

"Sorry for being late! I promise I -"

I saw a teenage cleaning girl who was covered in tattoos looking up at me in an evident disinterest as she continued mopping the floor. I apologised and looked around the room but there wasn't anybody in sight. Where the hell are they?

I put my bag and guitar down and took a seat on the stage.

●●●

I heard a loud creak as the door slowly opened. Finally someone bothered to show up; I've been sitting here for half an hour, wondering if I shouldn't call it a day. Even the cleaning girl left.

A willowy figure skulked through the door, holding a coffee cup and quietly whistling to itself. Ponsi looked at me surprised and smiled at me after he stopped getting on my nerves with his annoying whistling.

"Hey. You're early today."

"No, I'm on time, unlike you."

I snapped at him angrily while I took out my guitar and went on the stage to prepare the mic.

"Geez, what's up with you?"

Ponsi said, taking as much time as possible to take his fucking coat off. Does he want to irritate me even more? Does he really want to push my buttons? Fine, I'm not gonna make an idiot out of myself.

"What's up with me? Are you serious? Alright, I'm gonna tell you what's up with me! The first rehearsal I'm suppose to be in charge, you show up late and have the balls to call me out?!"

My emotions suddenly are set loose as I swing my arms furiously in the air. I feel the anger and vexation boiling inside of me and I catch a glance of Ponsi, who's keeping his distance from me. I'm so pissed; so fucking pissed and I don't really even understand where did these feelings come from.

"Holy shit, calm down. You always come late so why are you suddenly so pissed when I arrive few minutes later! And who told you, you're in charge?"

His usual pale complexion takes on a crimson colour and the blue charismatic eyes of his change into a pot of boiling water. He's irritated with me now as well but him yelling at me just stirs the anger inside of me more.

"You know why I'm always late? Cause I'm working my ass off on writing songs non stop just so this band can be less shitty! I thought...there was a spark of hope that this year's gonna be different but from the beginning it's fucked up! I can't find a fucking job, my dad's health's fucked up and it's my fault! Besides that, I have to take care of this band but it looks like I'm the only one, who gives a fuck about it since you don't even bother to show up on time!"

And that's it; I saw Ponsi's frightened eyes as I break down from anger and swiftly sit on the stage.

It's too much for me to handle. I've realised that there is no way I can cope with everything by myself.

My temper has calmed down and all I could feel now is dejection slowly reaching my heart. What's wrong with me? I thought the times where I'd break down constantly were over me as soon as I stopped smoking pot. Why am I suddenly so emotional?

"I'm sorry."

I looked up.

There was a big distance between Ponsi and I, not just physically, but emotionally as well. The fear in his eyes saddened me but it wasn't present anymore. All I could see now is sorrow and sadness, which made my heart sink even lower. To my surprise, he remained stiff and his eyes were twitching around the room, nervously.

I sighed.

"No, I'm sorry... I took all my anger out on you. It's just -"

"- too much. Get it. Please don't start yelling at me again."

His lips turned into a sudden smirk and that was enough for my heart to jump up out of relief. I chuckled and covered my red face with my hands. Ponsi's steps were heard in the silence as he came to the stage and sat right next to me.

"Here, take it. I don't give a fuck if your New Year's resolution is to quit smoking; you need it."

He took a packet of cigarettes out of the pocket of his flannel and handed me one piece. I smiled at him in order to thank him.

"Thanks. I guess you have questions, right?"

"Yeah but it can wait."

He said and lit his ciggy along with mine. The first puff felt like heaven. Like a pure Eden.

Ponsi's right arm reached behind me and he began to rub my back to comfort me.
An adorable smug covered his slim face. I took out my cigarette and kissed him, to end all the remaining tension.

I need this. I need to escape all my troubles and just let my emotions take the lead. I need to get my sanity back.

Suddenly, I heard something and I snapped my head away from him, however, he didn't really catch my drift and leaned towards me again.

"Wait, Ponsi."
"What?"
"Sean is here."

I whispered and Ponsi quickly jerked his head towards the door, where Sean was standing.