Long Ago // Connor McDavid

Fifteen

My summer went by so damn slow, yet before I knew it, I had just packed up everything in my room, shoved it into a bunch of boxes & suitcases, and was now waiting in a terminal at the Toronto Pearson International Airport for my flight to Edmonton.

Saying goodbye to my parents was the hardest, mostly because I could tell they were struggling to let me go. Saying bye to Liv & Kiana was also so hard, I can't remember the last time we went a week without seeing one another, but Liv was headed to Western University, and Kiana was headed to the University of Ottawa.

We were all so grow up. So much had changed, and so much more was about to change. I had said bye to Dylan the day I left, he didn't make the Arizona Coyotes opening night roster, so he'd be playing another season in Erie, which almost made me sad. He wouldn't have Connor who is his literal best buddy, plus he wouldn't have us.

All this thinking and realization had me feeling very nostalgic, and I got that weird nauseous feeling, not because I was about to get on a plane, but that I was scared. I wasn't necessarily scared of what lied ahead for all of us, but I was scared of all this change. I've never done well with change, and a shit ton of it was about to happen.

I was drawn out of my deep thoughts to a text message;

Connor: Hey babe, you should be boarding your flight soon if you haven't already, have a safe flight and i'll see you when you land, love you lots.

That text just made this all even more surreal. Holy shit, i'm about to move to Edmonton with Connor. Well, kind of, I mean, he'll be playing there, and i'll be going to school, but still, we will be living together in the same condo. Wow.

I snapped myself out of all this over thinking before I could make myself throw up. I grabbed my backpack and picked up my passport and ticket and headed over to the boarding line, fiddling my fingers as I did so.

Once on the plane, I had a nice window seat and decided to try and get some sleep, I usually never sleep on planes but this time I did. Well kinda. I kept dousing in and out of sleep.

The flight was smooth & quick. Almost not quick enough. I just wanted to get to Edmonton and hug Connor. I wanted to hold him and hear all about training camp. Have him show me his favourite little places he's found to eat at. Have a nice cold beer and watch a movie together. I just wanted to see him. I needed to see him.

I love Connor, I love him a lot. He's my best friend, well one of them. And i'm not just saying that because he's my boyfriend. He genuinely is my best friend. He's my favourite person. It scares the living crap out of me that he is my honest to god everything.

I can't wait for this new adventure we're about to embark on together, but at the same time I just want to press pause. No I want to press rewind and pause. Can I do that!? well that's what I want.

I want to rewind to the past year we've spent together and everything we've done and gone through. I want to rewind all of it. I also want to pause it. I want to pause where we're at. Where we're still young with no real responsibilities. I just want to cherish it for as long as possible.

But,

As soon as I get off this plane, I won't be able to pause or rewind anything. Everything will be new and unfamiliar. The city, the people, my school, our home. Everything except for Connor and I will be new, and i'm both thrilled & terrified for it.

All I can hope is that we continue to grow together, thrive together and love together. That's all I want. I hope that although everything is new, everything still somehow finds a way to stay the same. I don't want to look back in a few months time and think "wow, that was so long ago, how the hell are we where we are now!?"