Chapter 4

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Asfandyar was taken aback when she answered the phone so quickly. Why was she not asleep at this late hour? 

"Hello?" He asked. There was no answer. But he knew she was there. He could hear her breathing. It seemed like she was out of air. He frowned.

"Zubia?" He tried again. 

"Asfi..." 

Asfandyar's breath caught in his throat. Her voice sounded so.. different. Nasally. As if she had been crying. 

"Zubia kia hua hai? Tum theek hou?" He asked worriedly. 

"K-kuch nahi. M--main theek hun."

Asfandyar sat up straighter. Yeah right. He was certain, beyond a doubt, that something was seriously wrong with his wife.

"Zubia tum mujhe pareshaan kar rahi hou. Please mujhe batao kia baat hai."

On the other side of the line, Zubia was trying to calm her erratic breathing while furiously wiping away the tears that kept pouring out of her eyes. She felt like she was seriously overreacting but the sudden nightmare had shocked her so much that she felt utterly helpless. It was evident that time had not yet healed all her wounds. She wished now that she hadn't answered his call for she hated for him to hear her like this but at the same time he was the only person who could make everything all right. Asfandyar could always make everything all right. 

"Maine kaha na main theek hun. Sub theek hai" was her stupid answer.

Asfandyar was getting more and more frustrated now. He knew she was lying and it angered him that she still couldn't fully confide in him, after all this time. 

"Zubia please mujhe aur pareshaan mat karo! Mera dimagh kharab ho raha hai soch soch ke ke pata nahi tumhe kia hogaya hai. Main tumhara husband houn! Agar mujhse share nahi karogi toh aur kis se karogi??!" He exclaimed, exasperated. 

"Main nahi chahti ke aap mujhe iss tarhan dekhein." She had calmed down a bit now and even though the tears were still coming, she was no longer sobbing hysterically.

That made him even more angry. He was almost considering driving back home right there and then. 

"Pagal hogayi hou?! Zubia mujhe koi farq nahi parta. Mujhe aur kitni dafa yeh baat kehni pari gi tumhe yakeen dilaane ke liye? Tumhe abhi bhi mujh per trust nahi hai?" 

Zubia's heart skipped a beat. "I'm sorry" was all she could manage.

"Don't be sorry. Just tell me ke kya baat hai? Such such."

"Itni bari baat nahi hai waise. Main.....main aise hi overreact kargayi pata nahi kyun. Mujhe aik bura khwaab aya tha. Bus."

Asfandyar paused, digesting this new piece of information. She had told him once about her nightmares during the days she lived with her khala as well as in the hostel. 

"Acha. Mujhse baat karo. Mujhe batao. Kia tha?" 

And then she told him. How she had seen her mother's lifeless body being carried away. Her father's cruelty.  Her cries for help as she wept outside the gate. How her brother's face kept appearing, looming larger and larger. The feeling of the icy water when she took the plunge. Flashes of these memories all jumbled together, making her brain go haywire. The hurt, the anger, the anguish, the pain. She had literally woken up gasping for air. And she told him all this. 

As Zubia paused to take some deep breaths, Asfandyar was silent. Her words echoed through his mind. He was now clutching the phone so tightly that his knuckles had gone white. The same rage that he always felt whenever he remembered the torture his wife had gone through came bubbling to the surface. He knew she was still not completely over it and that was more than understandable. Itne saalon ke gham sirf aik acha aur khushgawar saal nahi mita sakta. It would take time. But they were together now and they would get through it, he was sure of it. 

"Zubia. Main houn na tumhare saath? Tum iss sab ko thora waqt dou. Hum mil ker sub theek ker denge."

"Main.. main aapke baghair aik raat bhi nahi guzaar payi sahi se. Sharmindagy horahi hai mujhe."

"Ya Allah Zubia. Khuda ka khauf karo. It's okay. Sunn rahi hou na main kya keh raha houn? It's. Okay. Issme sharmindagy ki koi baat nahi hai. Mujhe bohat acha lagta hai jub tum mere saath apni problems share kerti hou. Mera dil karta hai ke tumhari zindagi sirf khushiyon se bhar doun."

Hearing this another tear rolled down her cheek. "Aap itne ache kyun hain?" 

This made Asfandyar roll his eyes. "I know right?" He said in a mischievous tone, trying to lighten the mood. She was silent. Her fingers were absent-mindedly playing with the gold heart hanging around her neck.

"Acha choro in sub baaton ko. Suno. Humara rishta itna kamzor nahi hai. It doesn't matter ke main kahan houn aur tum kahan. Hum physically jitna bhi door houn, main phir bhi tumhare bohat qareeb houn. Tumhe yeh pata hai na?"

She nodded but then realised that he couldn't really see her. "Haan. Pata hai."

"Toh phir pareshaani kis baat ki hai. Araam se so jao. Main idher hi houn. Aik baat sunaon?" He said as some poetry he had once read somewhere suddenly came to his mind. 

"Sunaen."

"Raat jitni bhi sangeen hogi

Subah utni hi rangeen hogi

Kiske roke ruka hai sawera

Raat bhar ka hai mehman andhera."

Zubia couldn't help it. She burst out laughing. The words sounded so funny coming from him. "Mujhe nahi pata tha ke aap shair-o-shairi bhi karlete hain."

"Hahaha. Bus dekh lou. Aapka shauhar bohat multi-talented hai. Waise I only said all that to make you laugh. And it worked. Shukar hai tumhari hansi sunne ka mauqa toh mila."

Their conversation continued as the minutes ticked by. Zubia was now feeling a million times better than she did before. Her tears had subsided and her heartbeat had returned to its normal rate. The events of this night had really exhausted her. She wanted to continue hearing Asfi's soothing voice but felt herself blinking as sleep started to take over slowly. 

 "Thank you for making me feel better

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"Thank you for making me feel better. Ub theek hun main. Aap bhi thak gaye honge bohat. Aap so jayen."

"Tum so gi toh mujhe sukoon ki neend aye gi na."

"Acha main bhi sonay lagi hun."

"Sachi?"

"Sachi."

"Okay. So jao. Agar koi issue hua toh mujhe foran call karna okay? Promise karo."

"Promise."

"Okay phir. Good night. Subah call karunga tumhe. I love you."

"Okay. Good night. I love you too Asfi. Bohat zyada." 

Asfandyar placed his phone on the nightstand and took off his glasses. Rubbing his eyes his mind replayed the conversation they had just had. He wished he was there with her right now, holding her. Vowing to never stay apart from her now unless there was an unavoidable emergency, he finally sank down under the covers and closed his eyes at the same time Zubia closed hers, miles apart.

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