Unedited: Because perfection is just an illusion.

Chapter 4

I woke up, stretching. I was feeling blissfully empty until I caught sight of my arm, yesterday's events came crashing down on me

I mechanically walked into the restroom splashing water on my face.

I stared at myself in the mirror.

"Look, Alexis. It's not that big of a deal. You've made out with people, well one person, before. The point is calm the fuck down." I told myself at the mirror.

I got started on my makeup and immediately felt myself calm down. As I finished I could feel that familiar shift in me. I immediately felt a lot better.

For me, makeup wasn't just something I applied because I think it makes my face prettier. I mean, I actually don't mind my face without it. Makeup to me was a mask I hid behind. It signified a transition within me. I went from Alexis, the girl who was easily taken advantage of by her own sister and a girl whose coping mechanism for everything was self-harm to Alexis, the little ball of energy who has her life all put together.

Satisfied with my makeup, I grabbed a black turtleneck sweater and some acid wash jeans, stuffed my feet into my worn out combat boots and scurried out snagging an apple on the way.

As soon as I stepped out, all memories of yesterday vanished. I saw Ethan standing outside school.

"Where were you yesterday?" I whined as I caught up to him.

"Huh?" he asked.

"Babe, you said you'll sneak in so we could re-film those scenes?"

"OH. SHIT. Yes. Sorry. I got really carried away editing and writing my script for my next collab." He said apologetically

"Sigh, never mind then." I muttered.

"What about today? Can I come over?" he asked.

"PLEASE DO." I replied.

We grinned at each other when Em popped over.

"Hey, you two." She greeted.

She looked over at Ethan and asked "Hey, what happened yesterday? Didn't you plan on uploading something else, that skit we filmed?"

"I wanted to, but the last few scenes were just complete shit." Ethan said.

"Way to motivate the team!" I said dryly.

"OH OH OH OHHHHHHHH. Em started excitedly practically bouncing up and down. You're only 100,000 away from a million subscribers. ONE MILLION, Ethan."

I started bouncing too. "THAT'S AMAZING" I exclaimed as Em leaned in to Ethan a hug.

"Alex, I know you're not a good texter, but it wouldn't hurt to reply once in a while, you know" she said with a pout.

"You texted?" I asked unlocking my phone to check. 17 unread messages from Em

"Oh, you have texted." I said after a pause.

'' "I'm so sorry. I was away from my phone all yesterday," I said pushing down images that threatened to rise into my head.

"Ugh, fine. I JUST HAVE A LOT TO TELL YOU. I think I've just officially kissed a girl!"

'WHAT? WHO? Bitch, I need detaiiils."

"Okay so we went to the café as a first date. And we hit it off like really really well. You know like the kind of people you just sorta click with? So she ordered a chocolate milkshake, you know the kinds that have a KitKat on top. I was about to steal her KitKat when she quickly snatched it up and put it in her mouth and challenged me to bite off the other half, you know sorta like lady and the tramp style. I don't know what possessed me when I leaned in and she just closed the gap between us and we full on made out. It tasted like chocolate. IT WAS AMAZING, okay? AND SHE WANTS TO GO ON A FREAKING SECOND DATE. Her name is Amy." Em finished in one breath, a habit that she caught o from me.

Whenever I said anything that was exciting/ potentially embarrassing I say it all as fast as I can.

"Em, that is ridiculously ADORABLE." I said. Em flashed me a grin.

"I'm so excited for you" I said, smothering her in a bear hug.

"I need to see a picture, right now." I declared.

Em pulled out her phone and showed me a shippable selfie of the both of them. There was Em, a blonde with sparkling green eyes in a button down shirt tucked into her pants and Amy, with sleek black pixie cut and a septum piercing in a leather jacket.

"Damn, she's prettyyyy."

"I'm too nervous to tell her that I'm bisexual though."

"I think you should probably do that soon."

"I'm just scared she won't be as into this anymore."

"Honestly Em, you don't need her in your life if she can't accept you." Em just looked at me thoughtfully and said nothing.

***

Yayyyie another chapter up. I just saw blobfish truffles on the internet and now I need it.

It's 4 am rn. And I'm on my bunk bed trying to not wake up my parents because technically my one week internet curfew isn't over.

Sigh all that's going on is 'exams exams.' Yay though the last one is in about 4 hours

If you are even still reading my book, thank you so much.❤️

I'm still mildly insecure about my writing but thanks for reading!