Should be Mine

Part 7

Natasha

Something was wrong. Something just wasn't right.

I moved in with Bruce. But..

He cleaned, and I cleaned, but we didn't. He cooked or I cooked, but we didn't. I couldn't even think of sharing food with him, forks and spoons were a far away thought.

And when it came time to share the bed. I should, but.. I couldn't. Bruce is my boyfriend. We are supposed to stay together. But I just couldn't think of lying beside him. I just couldn't imagine walking in, in my night clothes, and...

No, it was so wrong. How should I walk out of the bathroom and not see Steve's innocent smile. How could I not lie beside him, how could I wake  up beside someone who isn't Steve.

When I was cooking dinner, our first night together. Bruce hugged me from behind. I didn't like it. I didn't like the feeling of his arms around my waist. I didn't like his chin on my shoulder.

"Bruce, I.. Need to get some vegetables " I lied, to walk away.

When he lay down and called me beside him, I smiled faintly, "I don't think its a good idea, I snore a lot" I lied.

"You didn't snore before" he said. Of course, we had shared a room once before, when we all were at Clint's.

"I have changed Bruce" I said, "In ways I can't even start to tell you".

I grabbed a pillow, and lay down on the sofa. He kept insisting to switch, but I don't want to be in a bed without Steve.

What was wrong with me? Was I that attached to him? Were my habits so bad that I couldn't even they to get rid of them. How could I get so addicted to him?

But.. He was a drug. Everything about him was addicting. His smile, his nature, the way his hands touched me, the way he calmed me, the way he soothed me.

Bruce reminds me of the monster I was, the reason I thought we could be together.

But Steve? Steve made me realize, I might not be that monster. Not anymore, I wasn't Natalia anymore. O was Natasha.. I was...

What was happening to me? I just couldn't sleep. I stayed awake for hours, I was again haunted. Not only by my past, but also with memories of Steve.

I was so suffocated, I wasn't doing well. I was horrible.

Bruce tried to cope with me as much as he could. Until, he tried to kiss me, five days after we moved in, and I didn't let him.

"Natasha?!! What's wrong with you? Are you still angry? Are you still mad at me for leaving you? Natasha, I thought we were past it" he shouted.

"I am past it, way past it" I said in anger, "actually, I am way past you"

"What? " he asked shocked at my rude answer.

"I am done with you Bruce, I don't love you, actually I never did. I.. I am a selfish human. I moved on, I.. I found comfort in someone else, I found comfort in him" I was crying as I spoke in the rudest tone, "I am sorry Bruce. But we were over the day you left".

I turned and I walked out of the apartment, he followed me, he kept speaking, but my ears were deafened. I didn't care about what he said.

He stopped following me, and I kept on walking, until I found my destination.

_____

Steve

The doorbell rang. I don't know why, but there was something special about this particular time.

I rushed to the door and opened it, only to find my life at my door.

"I... " she tried to speak, but I silenced her with a finger on her lips. Her eyes were red, there were tears in her eyes. Her lips didn't have to speak what I could read in her eyes.

I moved out, and got close to her, very close, she was hyperventilating, and so was I, her eyes were fixed to mine. I grabbed her waist, and pulled her closer, replacing my finger with my lips on hers, my hand getting entangled into her hair.

We kissed hungrily, she got on my feet, she held my head in place, as our tongues battled against each other, as our lips sucked onto each other. Our chests were crushed against each other. Our heartbeats ringing in our ears. She held onto my shoulders, and climbed onto me, wrapping her legs around my waist, and I supported her hips with my hand.

I carried her in, back to our room, as I went on kissing her. Until we were safe inside, with door closed and locked.

I crashed her ton the bed, and moved away to catch my breath, towering her.

She was smiling, as she looked into my eyes and caressed my hair.

"Why did you let me go? " she asked, breathlessly.

"If I had stopped you, you wouldn't have ever understood " I said.

"I.. Can't give you hopes" she said.

"Don't" I said, "Let me have what I can, for the moment".

"I am very selfish" she said.

"I don't care, Nat" I said, "Please me mine, till you can. Give me this happiness till you can. Stay with me, as long as you want, as long as you can. I will have this happiness, no matter how short it might be. I just want you, for as long as I can".

She smiled at me, "I can't promise you an eternity, but.. Right now... You are all I want"

I descended in to kiss her again.. But we were interrupted by a loud noise.

Our door was being beaten harshly.

"Bruce? " I said.

"No" Natasha said worriedly, "Hulk!! " we both looked at each other and then stared at the door.

****
Nat realized she wants Steve
But Bruce😑
What would happen now?
Would she understand she loves Steve?
Do give your reviews.