Part 19- I Don't Like Failure

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Nebulas and neon lights danced behind my eyelids in flickering tones, making my eyes ache. My body turned me away from this light, my eyes burning behind the lowered shutters of my lids. Where am I? What’s going on? Why is it so bright? Why are drums and guitars pounding in my head like an alarm? Alarm…aren’t I meant to be awake for something? I think it’s important…what was it?

I bolted upright and took a long breath as if it was my very first breath all over again. I ran my fingers through my hair and let my gaze flitter around what I recognised to be Carrie’s lounge. The music was what I identified to be the intro to MCR’s ‘Na Na Na’. Why it was playing, however, I had no idea.

Groaning and sleep coated mumbles swept through these song notes until the music was led to an abrupt stop. “Sorry,” Carrie said to the room as she rolled over on the sofa behind me with her phone in hand. “That was my alarm to wake me up to start filming. I get the day off because- Jamie. Jamie, get up now!”

“I’m awake,” I yawned grumpily. “What is it?”

Carrie almost fell on top of Mia and me as she scrambled off the sofa. Mia moaned something angrily into the cushion she was dozing on before snuffling down into it. The others were all in various stages of sleep around us too.

“It’s nine thirty, that’s when my alarm’s for. When the hell is your call back?” Carrie was staring at me now, and her words were starting to sink in.

By then, I felt like all of my internal organs had dissolved to dust. I was in Carrie’s flat, had none of my own belongings apart from the minimal things in my bag, and I had to be at the theatre for my call back at ten. Thirty Minutes.  I had no idea how far away the theatre was from here, for one, and even then what the fuck was I going to do?!

“I have to be there by ten,” I stated as I stumbled to my feet. I wobbled around the lounge, panic setting in on me as I went to stand with Carrie away from the sea of blankets and still sleeping friends. “How the fuck did this happen?” I yelped as I started to run rings around the room to gather up my belongings into my bag. “I should have been at home! I should be at the theatre by now!”

“I’m so sorry, Jamie,” Carrie said in disbelief as she joined me in the search for my things. “Look, I’ll help you get ready and then take you to the theatre. I’ll apologise for you and we will get you there! I’m just so sorry.”

I stopped moving and accepted the last tube of Jaffa Cakes that Carrie was holding out to me. “Carrie, I can’t possibly get there in time. Thanks and all, but I can’t,” I sighed sadly, stuffing the Jaffa Cakes into my bag and yanking the bag shut. “I can’t even go there in these clothes! I can’t believe I let this happen…” The best I could do was to arrive there insanely late, and even then, how could I face the director and everyone else by turning up late? Saying that I overslept or that I was comforting a friend could never cover up the blunder I’d made in doing this.

“Oh, just come with me,” Carried ordered me, grabbing the sleeve of my jumper as she dragged me to her room.

“How did I even fall asleep?” I fumed to myself as Carrie pulled me along behind her. “How did I let this happen? Why did I even come to this pizza night? Why didn’t I set an alarm on my phone as a backup instead of relying on the alarm clock which is back at my flat?”

Carrie dropped my arm as we entered her room. “Wow, I like your room,” I said mildly as I looked around at the large windows, photograph plastered wall and the abundance of Disney products which were artistically arranged throughout the room. It looked like a muted down version of the perfect Tumblr user’s bedroom…apart from the big windows.

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