The Perfect Face ||Oikawa Tooru x Reader||

Chapter 13

 Oikawa wanted to distance himself, which he did. Every time you tried to talk to your boyfriend, he would give you short responses, leaving you questioning whether you were still good enough for him. Or what you had done to make him react like this.

Except, he wanted you just as much as he did before, actually he needed you even more than he ever had before. Despite being put down at every attempt, you would still go check on him, get him food, and help him around on his crutches.

Mentally, he was defeated. His heart was breaking from not being able to play volleyball and the possibility that he may never be the player he once was. But, with the added fact that he was on the edge of losing you, he just wanted to get it over with. He was terrified of how much he loved you. When people ask the question, "would you rather be feared or loved?" his immediate thought was that he wanted people to fear how much they loved him. And he loved you, more than he had loved any girl before in his life, almost more than Iwaizumi. His own overwhelming feelings for you pushed a needle into his heart with every word he said that brought you down.

This wasn't who he was, and you knew the real him, but he was utterly terrified of the fact he loved you so much that he started pushing you away. He needed the love you offered, along with the truth and strength you gave. But he wanted to not feel that need anymore, he had never fully needed someone in his life apart from Iwaizumi.

Since he was basically immobile, his thoughts would devour him as he watched countless volleyball games, before it became too much to bear and he changed the channel.

While you continued with your classes, then coaching, and with your schedule, Iwaizumi was usually home when you were at class, while when you were at home he was in class. Oikawa was basically never alone except for the two-hour period where you both were at practice. He would crutch aimlessly around the apartment, dying to be able to walk again. He had gotten countless text messages as well as phone calls asking how he was and checking up on him. At his usual apartment, his roommates said there had been so many 'Get Better' gifts that they had begun to overflow out of his room.

Oikawa just wanted to escape, and when you were home and talking to him, he felt like he wasn't hurt at all, that the massive brace on his leg wasn't real. You had that effect on him. One that was filled with love and compassion, to the point where he forget about his current situation. But every time he replied in a manner he knew would offend you, he could feel the hate for himself grow.

As a defense mechanism, he would use the flaws to bring someone down, instead of build them up. He did this in volleyball games, but now he was doing this to 'protect' his heart. He knew, despite the confident, beautiful appearance you gave, that you were sinking in your own securities. Oikawa knew you had nothing to worry about, through his eyes you were beyond perfect, every blemish and every flaw was nonexistent.
He knew with everything you did you were just trying to help. But with every lingering second, he could feel his love and desperation for you grow.

"Tooru, I bought some milk bread." He could hear you call out from the kitchen, as he slid off Iwaizumi's bed, unconsciously following your voice.

"Thanks, but I don't want it." He said, feeling a prick in his chest as he spoke. "Fine, suit yourself." You tore off a piece, before he looked at you, with sad brown eyes that studied your every feature. You were too good for him, and he knew it.

He then turned and crutched back to Iwaizumi's room, while in your chest you felt your heart sink. Milk Bread always made him feel better. You could hide the hurt, and you did very it well, but Oikawa could still sense he was hurting you.