Merciful || Ivar the Boneless

e l e v e n

!! Warning: this chapter contains violence and rape !!

Eira's POV, a few months ago:

I was tired of constant running and hiding. My body was tired day by day and my mind was going crazy because of everything that has happened. I was alone, feeding on bugs and little rodents I was capable of catching. With each obstacle ahead of me I was weaker and more fragile. There have been times I thought I would just give up and kill myself or get killed somehow because there was no way I could let the berserker take me back. The survival instincts always kicked me, and I somehow found a strength within me to push further.

One time he almost got me, but I managed to get away from him. I ran two days straight without stopping afraid he might be right behind me. I guess I was wrong because even he needed some time to sleep and rest.

I was walking through the forest full of rocks and I came upon a little cave. I thought I would be safe there for a night. My body was craving some sleep and I couldn't afford to refuse it because I knew that would slow me down and perhaps kill me.

I lied down on the cold rocky ground, trying to find a position comfortable enough to fall sleep in. It was really hard to fall asleep even if I was lying in a big soft bed because my mind was going on and on, trying to come up with different scenarios.

The pictures of my parents dying, the berserker getting to me... Those were the most repeating situations in my head. I tried to shut down those images and instead I imagined myself killing the Berserker and Jarl Bjarke. My knife kissed by a fire slicing their backs open, me rubbing a salt in their wounds, hearing them scream in agony, me grabbing an axe and hit their back repeatedly until their ribs break.

I've always heard of bloody-eagle, but I've never seen it. Though my idea of it was clear. They had to pay and there was nothing that could stop me. Sooner or later my ideas will become the reality.

"Don't wake her," I heard a whisper. My eyes wide open, I jumped up reaching for my knife, but it was nowhere to be found. I looked around.

Three men were standing in the entrance of the cave. Big, bearded men with disgusting smirks on their faces. I knew this wasn't going to end up well. Either for me or them.

The tallest one made a step towards me, which made me do the same but the opposite way. I was scared but I wouldn't let them see me like that. I kept my face neutral trying to come up with something to offer them. I wanted to make another step backwards, but my back hit the wall behind me. Damn it. There was no way I could run.

The other men were standing in my only chance of escaping and I couldn't take them down without my knife. The tall man with a scar on his face was closer and closer which made me uncomfortable and terrified.

"Don't be afraid," he said to me with his stupid smirk. He meant in a sarcastic way, licking his lips. My stomach was now on water. I wanted to be far away from this place.

It happened fast.

He tried to grab me, I hit him with my best shot but that wasn't enough. I was small and in comparison, I was nothing. He was like a mountain and I was a sheep that lost her way from the field. Stupid, little harmless sheep.

They laughed at me. The sound of their amusement echoing later became a thing that haunted me throughout my nightmares. I tried once again. Their laugh made me angry, so I punched him in the nose, hurting my fist, but also breaking his nose. A little achievement. If it was the time for me to die and go to Valhalla, I wasn't going to go peacefully, I was going to die fighting for my life.

Unfortunately, they were three and I was screwed.

"You bitch," he yelled at me, holding his nose. The other men stopped laughing, coming towards me. I tried to kick them, but they grabbed me by my arms, pushing my back down so I ended up lying on my stomach on the cold ground. My face was pressed to the ground, almost tasting it. That's when I couldn't hold back the tears anymore. I felt a kick. Another one. I couldn't move because the two men were holding me really tight.

My breathing was faster and faster, my heart was in my throat. I was drowning in my tears. I was trying to free myself, jerking from side to side but it was useless. I was too weak. Then I felt it.

Two rough cold hands grabbed my ankles and spread my legs wide open. I felt the cold air hitting my upper thighs and my body froze. No, this couldn't be happening. Wake up, wake up I was telling myself. My eyes were shut, my brain trying to comfort me by thinking it was just a nightmare. It wasn't. The two men were now holding me, and my legs, so I wouldn't kick or move. The first time, I felt every single thing they did to me.

Those hands pulling up my skirt, grabbing my ass. I was screaming from top of my lungs, incapable of doing more.

"No one is coming to save you, sweetheart."

The image of his dirty rough hands holding my thighs while getting ready to penetrate me made me want to throw up. My whole body was in shock trying to process what was going on. My legs covered in goosebumps.

What came after that was like a slow motion. I was there, but it felt like my spirit left my body and watched from afar. My nails were buried down in the skin on my palms, making them bleed. It felt like there was no air for me to breathe, my lungs were on fire. The first thrust was the worst. I felt unimaginable pain and afterwards, I felt a warm fluid going down my thigh. With each thrust, the pain became smaller and smaller. After a while I wasn't trying to resist, it was useless. I gave up and lied there like a broken doll. I wish that was it.

But it wasn't.

The first night all three of them switched their turns few times. I was so weak, I couldn't stand and feel my body. The details of this night then became one big blur full of their moaning, laughing and my crying. That's when I became an empty vessel.

**

sorry for the graphics, but it was necessary for you guys to understand truly what she's been through and how it changed her.