That night, Josh and Ini fall asleep way before I do. I laid still hoping to fall asleep, but my brain was wide awake, meaning the rest of me was too. I decide to go out to the loungeroom and watch the third video. The two that I have already watched, have been hard, but I know that I owe it to (Y/N) to watch them all. I sit down with a glass of water, getting comfortable before I press play.
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*Wow, part 3 already. This hasn't gotten any easier, but I knew I had to say all these things. The third thing on my list... is the, um, kindness of your heart. I always admired how you were with your fans. You were always so kind and welcoming after shows and when people would recognise you on the street. Not only was it something that they loved about you, but it was one of the many things that fuelled my love for you.*
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I pause the video when I hear the sound of footsteps. I look to the doorway and a sleepy Josh emerges, rubbing his eyes.
"Dude, why are you up?" He asks, walking over and sitting down.
"I couldn't sleep so I decided to watch another part," I say quietly. "It will take me forever if I don't keep at it. You can go back to bed if you like, I'll be okay."
Josh rubs his eyes and shakes his head. "No, I couldn't really sleep either. I think this is all starting to get to me too. I really considered (Y/N) a friend, so this really sucks."
"Yeah." I nod. I then press play again.
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*Funny story time now! You know how I love a good story time. Well, it's about the time I first brought you home to meet my family. I was actually a little scared about how things were going to go, particularly with Jace. I knew he got shy around new people, and usually, it doesn't end well. However, he seemed to really like you. I think that was the moment I knew I had to keep you around. Can you do me a favour and make sure he's okay. He really loves you, and I think he still wants you to teach him how to play bass, and you, Mr Seeley, always keep your promises.*
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I pause the video and both Josh and I both wipe away tears. This is the first time I've seen him cry this whole time.
"Josh, it's alright to cry." I say. I know he needs to let it out. "You don't have to hold it for me. I you need to let go, let go."
"No." Josh says, abruptly. "Just press play please."
I can tell that he wants to cry, but I don't push it. He'll gieve in his own time.
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*Anyway, the thing that I actually wanted to say was: My parents eyes nearly popped out of their heads when I brought home this somewhat extroverted guy in a Pop-PUNK band. But then you spoke so hently, with such kindness. They adored you instantly.*
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I don't pause the video but I chuckle when she went a little off track from Jace to her parents. She always did that, it was always so cute.
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*They told me after you left how much they liked you and that made me so happy. Then later that night, when we went to tuck Jace in, he had the biggest smile on his face and he told me to text 'goodnight' to you. I'm pretty sure I forgot, so while I remember, 'Goodnight from Jace. anyway, I have a few things i need to take care of so I must head off. I'll see you in the next part. Goodnight Jay, from me this time.*
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I shut my laptop and wipe my eyes. I'm still not tired but I can't face watching another video. I can't bare to see her beautiful face right now. It'll only remind me of what I've lost.
Josh on the other hand, was a silent mess. His head was buried in his knees and barely audible wimpers are leaving his lips.
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This is short and crap but I thought I'd finish typing it up because I'm home from school because I didn't want to go to athletics day lmao
