a/n: im stoned as fuck and thought well lets give the gays everything they want
Troye's pov
conan: okay but get this
jacob: no clown shut your mouth
conan: thrift shopping... with fresh brewed tea
benny: yes
tyler: how about gym and fuck
troye: you've got my attention
thomas: same
conan: TROYLER SHUT UP
conan: SKSK
troye: heheh
jacob: guess who isnt getting laid tonight
tyler: Woah
hari: Wig
benny: omg
conan: omf
troye: im leaving
thomas: wow
Tossing my mobile down, I giggle to myself and think back to the thirtieth vine compilation I watched today, thinking that yes, this will be the cure to everything. A little fuck ya chicken strips here, a look at all those chickens there, that's the stuff that really butters my eggroll.
"Loser, get out of bed, we're going shopping." Jacob mutters, opening my door and giving me a stern look.
I groan and get out of bed, pulling on a grey hoodie and some sweatpants. I stumble out of bed and giggle at the world from my high point of view. That's right, Jaden hooked me up with some bud last night and your boy has been stoned ever since.
"You smell like shit," Jacob says as we walk down the stairs, me having just grabbed my shoes.
"Thanks, babe, you always know how to make me blush." I speak sarcastically, gripping the ledge as I jump from step to step.
We get out the front door and make our way down the boulevard, Jacob pulling me away from the ongoing traffic as I walk to the edge.
"Are you always this idiotic?" He questions, having to hold my hand and steer me in the right direction.
As we get up to the store I hold Jacob back as I feel the fresh air blowing down on us.
"If you don't start moving I'm going to throw you over my back and spank you when we get home." He threatens, making me titter.
"Oi, baby." I murmur cheesily.
He sighs and lets go of my hand, leaning down and sweeping me off my feet. Leaning me over his shoulder, he makes me squawk and pound on his chest to let me go.
"You'll get your walking privileges back when you decide to act like a normal human being." He grumbles, patting my butt and walking to the cart section. Pulling one out, he sets me in it and strolls us to the produce section.
"What a diiiiick," I drag my words out, leaning back in the cart and crossing my arms over my chest.
He picks out our groceries while I stare up at the lights as if they were galaxies. I quote random movies every once in a while, making Jacob grumble for me to shut up already. I call him the best boyfriend, leaning up and kissing his chest while he strolls us to the checkout line.
"Are you high or something?" He asks sarcastically.
I lean back and smile, "Maybe, who's asking?"
"Your boyfriend." He retorts.
"Wanna hit?" I ask, giving him a daring look
thirty minutes later, via the bix and mellet's lounge
"Bruhhhhhh," Jacob snickers, pulling my blunt from his mouth and letting a puff of smoke fall from his lips.
"Right?" I exclaim.
He stares off at the wall then lets out a little 'oo', digging in his pocket.
"Tic tac?" He offers.
I burst out laughing, "That's GAY."
We sit back and giggle like little boys, chewing on tic tacs and thinking about all things bliss. We have a chill night and share weed upon ourselves, finding a new bittersweet bond in each other.
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a/n: im the biggest dummy head i know but im a loving dummy head and i'll waste ur time. i dont know where i was going with this. adios my mothertruckers x
