Audible

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You can't hear the thoughts in my head, only I can

But sometimes, I feel like they have secret conversations without me

Whispering, muttering, murmuring about how careless I am, how reckless, destructive

I'm a walking heat wave, scorching, soaking up all the life around me with my scarred efforts of trying to be sane and connecting with other people is like asking the dark clouds not to rain or the sky, telling it not to be blue

My thoughts choke on me with their endless schizophrenia, their madness, their cries

All these little people and no one can hear them

Can you see the distress in my eyes? Can you see how badly I want to tell you that I'm not alright?

I take a match and light a thousand fireworks into the sky and watch them explode, all without a sound

The fire fills the void, multicolor on black, silver stars on grey

It could be a painting

No one notices, they only take in the beauty, not my message

I call into the earth, screaming

I have all these words, all these thoughts

But none of them are audible

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