Where She Belongs

Looking at the motivational poster, I couldn't stop myself from snorting at the ridiculousness of it all. 'Why fit in, when you were born to stand out?' Who ever came up with that masterpiece was clearly not a wolf-shifter or had ever been a teenager. I would have killed to fit in - literally. Maybe not literally, but well whatever. Time seemed to go slow in the waiting room, and looking sidewards at the woman to my right I wondered what she was in here for.

Did she grow up constantly wishing she could fit in with her family, friends, pack?

Had she nearly been killed by her bullies as a kid, or better yet - by an estranged, psychotic, vampire who was her biological father?

Maybe her parents had lied and kept a secret from her for twenty-four years too.

Another check of the time and a two minutes had passed, eleven in total past my actual appointment time. This was stupid. I didn't need to talk about my issues with a psychologist. I was well aware of what they were and didn't need to be taught breathing techniques if I felt panicky or to start a journal detailing my thoughts and feelings to help me process everything. 

I'd been here before, back was I was so much younger and completely helpless. After Gwen's cousins attacked for shits and giggles, the only way I got through it was knowing in a couple of years I'd be able to go. I could move out of home and leave them, leave it all behind me. So what about now?

I said nothing as I left. 

Just being there made me anxious. I didn't want to talk to anyone about David. When I did, I spoke to Mum. In someways it was cruel and I wondered why it was always her. Was I trying to hurt for her how I had been hurt? On bad days I told myself it was so she knew she had made the right decisions for both of us by staying away; a tiny way to ease the guilt I knew she was full of. We both tried to see the best in him, and luckily fate never let it get too far as it would have ended up costing us everything. She understood, more than I thought she or anyone ever could the first time I broke down in front of her and now it was something we managed to bond over; a way for both of us to heal and move on.

"Ah, you're not supposed to be out yet?" Hannah quizzed the second I made it onto the street.

"Appointments got cancelled. Doctor is sick or something." I lie.

"Yeah right." She squeezed my shoulder, the concern on her face touching. I never told her the truth, about what we are, what I am. She did know about the family politics and attempting kidnapping minus a few details. It was enough.

"Positive." Thankfully she dropped it.

We went to our favourite Japanese place for lunch and amazingly she didn't bring any of it up once. Instead we talked about the normal and everyday things like changes at work, the latest with her and Stephen and how the brother she never did like, was now in jail thanks to his not so great business partners who did some not so great things. Turns out, other families were just as messed up as mine.

"So, where are you off to this weekend? I hope Aiden has something special planned." She fished, hoping I'd slip up and tell her something better than we were heading home to see my family. 

"Considering my parents and brothers are all going to be under the same roof, I doubt that." 

We soon finish up and say our goodbyes, which makes me almost regret cancelling my appointment. In a couple of hours we'll be starting the drive home, and I will be attending my very first full moon party. My parents and Gwen's thought it would be a good opportunity for me to run with the pack. A coming out of sorts. I thought it was going to be a new version of hell and wished I had kept my wolf genes dormant. Thankfully no one knew about my other side, and the fact I know could change was placed on Aiden's arrival - the mate crap they all went on about so much to blame, or thank.