10 | Broken

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(I already know somebody is gonna have something to say about the contents of this chapter. Don't read it if you don't like it is all I can say about it. Consider this your "warning".)


Leah's POV

Jennifer is undressing me mid-kiss and I am not mad at it. I raise my arms over my head and we separate our lips for a brief moment so that she can pull my shirt off of my body. It hits the floor and she picks me up and carries me to her/our bed and continues kissing me deeply. The kisses move to my neck and I am starting to sweat a little at this point.

This is hot, nasty, and just a little mean. I like it.

I use my hands to pull Jennifer's shirt off and she keeps kissing my body. She moves down further and further until she is stopped by my pants. I raise my hips and remove them quickly before laying down again and opening my legs more.

"Tell me, Leah. Is this what you fucking wanted?" Jennifer grits, licking her fingers once before she inserts them into me. I lay my head back and whimper a bit. I keep hearing Jennifer make little snarky comments and mutter things to me, some of them registering, others not-so-much.

All of this is happening quickly. We went from fighting, to this in less than a minute.... and now that I am here, with her between my legs... I think it was a mistake.

Jennifer has always pleased me. She has always been good to me. Never intentionally mean or rude. But right now, in this exact moment she is being mean as hell.

As I lay here under Jennifer, naked and vulnerable as hell, I start actually hearing the words she is saying while ripping her fingers in and out of me aggressively.

"This is what you wanted. For us to be okay... go back to normal. Have hot sex and pretend nothing fucking happened. All we needed to do was fuck, right?"

I become very uncomfortable knowing that she is doing this in a malicious way. "Jennifer!" I groan, not in a pleasant way. She looks up at me and shakes her head before burying her face in me. She grabs my thigh and squeezes as hard as she can while she lets her tongue aggressively lick and suck between my thighs. I feel my eyes getting teary and I orgasm.

That was, without a doubt, the worst and most emotionally painful orgasm I have ever had in my life. I have never seen, or even thought I would see, Jennifer be that way towards me. She didn't fuck me because she loves me or found me attractive in that particular moment. She fucked me to make me shut up and be a bitch about things. That is what just ripped my heart right down the middle.

I quickly sit up, tears running down my face, and I shove Jennifer away from me. I grab my clothes and lock myself in the bathroom to cry in peace. Jennifer doesn't say a word or try to stop me. She knows exactly what she just did. She broke me. She broke us.

-

Going on minute 35 of soaking in the bath with a broken heart and tired eyes and I finally hear something other than my own breathing. Tapping on the door.

"Leah, please let me come in there." Jennifer says from the other side. What could she possibly want? "Leave me alone." I mutter, barely audible. "I am coming in." She says. Seconds later she opens the bathroom door and feel her looking at me. I give her no attention and keep my eyes focused on the ripples in the water where each of my teardrops hit. She starts to pace back and forth and can't bring myself to look up at her. I remain seated in a little ball with my back mostly to her.

"Leah, I need you to look at me." Jennifer says, breaking the silence again. "Leah." I blink slowly and shake my head. "Baby, please look at me." Jennifer says, nearing the tub. "Get the fuck away from me." I hiss. She freezes and I hear her sigh. "I know I fucked up." She says from where she stands. "I am sorry. You know I don't mean to hurt you, Le. I love you. I am sorry that I let my emotions and hard feelings get the best of me in there. Please, we need to talk about it." Jennifer insists. Talk to her? Not happening.

I have never, not once, been genuinely afraid of Jennifer and what she is capable of doing. I never had a reason to be, and I damn sure never thought I would have a reason to be. But after tonight, my whole perspective on everything just flipped upside down and I am scared of her. I am scared of what she might do.

After nearly twenty minutes of Jennifer trying to get me to speak, she gives up. She leaves the bathroom and when she does I start bawling again. I get myself out of the tub and peer into the bedroom to see if she is there. Thankfully, she isn't. I grab some clothes and throw them on, and I start to wonder where she went. I carefully glide down the dark hallway and find Jennifer sleeping on the couch. I guess this means she wants me in the bed?

I let out an uneasy sigh and head to the bedroom, closing and locking to door before I get into bed.

I lay here in total silence, eyes wide open and mind running at full speed. I keep replaying tonight over and over, seeing that look in her eyes, hearing the tone in her voice, and feeling the immense pressure from her fingers. I didn't ask for that. I did not ask for any of that. I wanted to be loved and cherished, not treated like some worthless street whore.

The question that is pressing me the most, the one I can't stop thinking is a scary one for me. One I am not ready to answer, because I am scared to death of what reality might hold.

Can we survive this? Is there any hope for getting past what happened tonight?

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