Walking the Wire | PETER PARKER [1]

| 33 |

Eloise was only gone for a week, but everything has changed. She can't look at herself in the mirror without picturing herself attacking her friends and killing an innocent person. Eloise can't sleep without her guilty thoughts bearing down on her. She can't eat without wanting to throw up in disgust over what she did.

Eloise considers calling Bucky once, to ask him when it gets better, but she ends up just holding the phone in her tight grasp while staring out at the city as she sits on the edge of the fire escape, her feet dangling off the side. Eloise is only wearing sweatpants with a loose white tank top in the early December weather, but she doesn't even register the cold. Her mind is running a hundred miles a minute.

Eloise stares down at her hands for the hundredth time. She can't stop her mind from picturing them choking someone out.

Her eyes squeeze shut and she clenches her fists shut.

"Hey."

Her eyes snap open and Eloise jumps back. The top of her head hits the metal railing hard.

"Oh, sorry!" Spider-Man says, dropping from the bottom of the fire escape from the apartment above Eloise's. He takes off his mask and tosses it to the side as he squats next to her with a concerned look twisting his features.

Wincing and rubbing her head, Eloise turns to him. "Hey, Peter."

He cringes at her pain. "Didn't meant to scare you. Are you okay?"

"Yeah," She replies, her hand dropping to her side as the pain in her head subsides.

Peter's worried eyes study her face, then he sits down next to her. His feet dangle off the side beside Eloise's. Her eyes slide over the fading bruises on his face. With a bit of makeup, they'd be invisible.

"Do some crime-fighting?" Eloise asks with a weak smile.

He shrugs. "Slow day, just helped someone pick up some spilled papers that blew into the street." He leans back on his hands and watches the brunette girl carefully. "How are you holding up so far?"

"So far, not so good," She admits with a weak chuckle. When Eloise catches Peter's concerned gaze, she says, "But Bucky said that it should get easier. I'll be okay soon."

He nods and looks out at the city. Silence fills the lull in their conversation, but it's not uncomfortable. Peter and Eloise just have a lot on their young minds right now, and sometimes you don't need to talk to share your emotions. From his posture and expression, Eloise can tell that Peter's overwhelmed and worried as always. His hair is matted and greasy, and she wonders when the last time he took a shower was. It isn't a thought she has out of disgust, but rather concern. He needs to take care of himself.

Eloise wonders  if Peter can read her as easily as he usually can. Does he see how tired she is? How conflicted she is, and how scared she is of herself?

"How're your parents?" Peter asks suddenly, breaking their silence. Eloise glances at him questionably. He adds, "You ask about May sometimes, but I realized that I never ask about your parents."

Eloise shrugs and looks away. Sighing, her breath visible in the brisk air, she leans against the cool railing. "I don't know. I've only seen them once since we got back."