Symphony | ✓

Chapter 36

The music coming from the orchestra bounced off the walls and reverberated through the halls, filling the place with quick fast-paced melodies. Al and Kenneth were sitting on wooden stools a distance away from the orchestra. Leo was leading the practice. His hands were moving quickly in the air as he conducted them. The school orchestra still had one out-of-campus competition to take part in before the fourth-year students graduated.

"They're a lot better now." Kenneth turned his head a bit, turning at the sound of Al's voice. The blind man smiled a bit, running his hands up and down his tanned hands. Al rarely wore short sleeves. Al was tapping his feet on the wood board floor as he hummed along to the music. Al was going to join the school orchestra to play the national anthem at the graduation ceremony, so he had an excuse to hang around the practice hall for longer than usual.

"Yeah, they've been playing decently," Kenneth commented, looking away from Alejandro. He turned his gaze to the podium where Leonardo was conducting the group. Kenneth smiled a little, noticing the serious look on the dirty blonde's face. Kenneth had always thought everyone within the borders of the college's walls was serious—a bit too serious at times. Ken looked away before staring down at his shoes. He didn't really have a reason to be in the hall. It was just that James had left the college a bit early, and he was stuck along.

"How's James?" Alejandro asked, making Kenneth turn to face him.

"He's alright," Ken answered pushing some of his dark hair out of his face. Before staring down at his feet again. It was obvious Al was trying to start a conversation, but Kenneth wasn't in the right mood to talk about James. After the day they had kissed on the playground Kenneth's face had been a permanent red color whenever he was around the redhead—or if anyone simply mentioned James the way Alejandro did right now. His face would have been a lot redder if it was someone who would tease or poke fun at him, but Al wasn't like that, and it was a little comforting to Ken that the pianist couldn't see his tomato red face, anyway.

"Hmm..." Al trailed, cocking his head to the side as his teeth caught his bottom lip in a soft bite. The orchestra paused to take a break, and the hall was a lot quieter compared to before.

"Have you talked to him about how you feel?" Alejandro asked, making Kenneth open and close his mouth. Kenneth was unsure of how to put his current situation into words. Yes, he had told James how he felt, and yes, the two had kissed but James avoided talking about anything regarding it. He would even kiss Ken to shut him up if he tried to bring up 'dating' and 'love.' Kenneth wasn't sure if that was a wordless rejection, or whether James was planning to take his sweet time to think about it. Either way, it made Kenneth feel deep insecurity that had been eating at him from the inside out for the past few days.

"I have," Kenneth answered when he remembered Al was still waiting for a response. "I don't think—" Kenneth started saying then paused. He sighed, searching his head for the right words. "I don't think he took my confession seriously. Or, maybe he did, and he doesn't want to hurt my feelings by rejecting me."

Alejandro stayed quiet as he thought about what Kenneth had told him. He wasn't very close to James, so he couldn't think of a reason why James would do that.

"I'm not sure why he would do that," Al ended up admitting, and a sad smile made its way to Kenneth's lips.

"Yeah, me neither. If he wants to reject me he should just do that—" Kenneth paused mid-sentence, turning his gaze to the orchestra that had started to play again. "If he wants to reject me, he should just do that instead of giving me hope," Kenneth repeated, finishing his sentence before letting out a deep sigh of frustration. Al heard the wariness and nervousness in Ken's tone, and he wished he could help, but there wasn't anything he could do. The two saxophonists had to figure things out together. Al did hope they got a happy ending at the end of it all.

"Al?"

"Hmm? The pianist hummed, cocking his head towards Kenneth's voice.

"Why are you so nice to me despite—" Kenneth paused, biting his bottom lip before letting out a sigh. He was fidgeting with his fingers and wondering if he should bring up what he wanted to even though Al hadn't. He thought about it for a bit, before deciding it was the right thing to do. "Why are you so nice to me despite everything that happened in the past? Despite everything I did to you?" Kenneth asked, letting out the question that had been dancing around in his head ever since he and Alejandro teamed up for the content together. They had fallen into good terms even though Kenneth had never apologized, and it was plaguing him.

"I guess, if I keep grudges it would only hurt me in the long-term," Alejandro explained. "And besides, you've changed, so what's left to be angry about?"

A lot. Kenneth thought to himself. There's a lot to be angry about. He repeated to himself as he stared at Al's smiling face. He remembered how he had run Al's confidence to the ground when they had the same instructor. He felt guilty—cruel. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry for doing all that to you," he found the voice to say. It felt awkward to have an apology slip past his lips. He wasn't used to it. Changing was hard, wasn't it?

"It's okay," Al said with a small smile. Kenneth smiled too, thanking him again before looking away. The two continued to listen to the orchestra practice. Though, Kenneth's mind wasn't really on it. He was thinking of James. He was thinking of the future, and he couldn't help wishing that the former would end up in the latter.

When the practice was over, and the students had packed up their instruments and arranged the hall, Leo came over to Al and Ken. He talked to them about the song they were playing, and they spoke briefly about graduation. Somehow, Leo and Al had ended up talking to each other, leaving Ken out of it. Ken didn't mind. He smiled even. He liked observing the two interact with each other. It was like you could see the affection radiating from them.

Kenneth wanted that.

He hoped he would be able to have that with James someday.