Night in the Ruts

Something Amazing - Steven

"Steven!  Hurry the fuck up!"  Goddammit, Joe, just let me think for one minute!

        I was nervous.  Not only because I have no fuckin' clue how to roller-skate, but because I was about to see Charlie again.

        Why I was nervous around her, I don't know.  I try not to show it because, well, I'm Steven Tyler for Christ's sake!  She made everything seem out of proportion.  Like, a rainy day is a good thing, or... A rockstar is a pre-pubescent boy in the math club trying to get the head-cheerleader.  She makes everything seem... Like, what the fuck?  I find myself thinking that a lot after I say something to her.  Why would I say that, why would I do that, why would I... I feel like an idiot, to say the least.

        What if the band doesn't really like her?  What if her dad doesn't like me?  What if her step-mom is as scary as her real mom?  What if Charlie doesn't feel the same way about me?  What if she's really with that Nicky kid?

        Finally, I emerged from the apartment to meet four impatient people.  "You rush us out the door, but then you take seven years to get ready!" Tom says.  I wish they'd all just shut up.  "Where are we going, anyway?"

        "What is this something amazing?"  Joe's making fun of me, I know it.

        "Yeah, man, what're we getting into?" Tom agreed.  I made them dress nice because this is Charlie we're talking about!  I made them wear shirts with no holes, no stains... Only the best for my gir–

        What the fuck?!  Why would I think that?  Only the best for my girl.  Really?!

        "You're acting a lot like my mom on Sunday morning," Joe whined.

        Oh my God.  Stop talking.  "Why do you look so nice?" Joey demanded.

        Jesus.  Shut up!  "Because he's in love," Brad replied smartly.

        Alright.  That tears it.  "I'm not–" I say fiercely, only to be cut off by four laughing people.  They don't believe me.  "Shut up.  All of you!"  They don't listen.  Aren't I supposed to be the band leader?  "Would you shut the fuck up?"

        I don't know what told them I was being deadly serious.  Maybe it was the fact that I was pissed beyond belief at how embarrassed I got when Brad said... What he said.  Maybe it was the deep red color my face had taken on–both in anger and... Yes, embarrassment.

        He's the second person that's said the word love.  Joe was the first, way back when I first really talked to Charlie.  God, Charlie.  The most beautiful girl in all of the world, and she's just about mine.

        That's the problem, though.  Does she feel the same way?  I'm not entirely sure how I feel, but I know there's something that's making me go after her–not just the want of one fun night, because with the way she seems, I won't be getting that any time soon.

        Joe interrupted my thoughts: "Nervous?" he asked quietly, falling in to step beside me on the way down the stairs.

        "Psh, no," I say as though the idea where ridiculous.  He shakes his head with this little laugh thing, watching his feet.  "Okay.  Fine."

        "Thought so," he mutters.

        "Shut up," I advise him yet again.

        When we were all packed inside the car, ready to go to Charlie's house, I told the guys where we were going.  I didn't tell them before because they would've blatantly refused to come with me.  Why I wanted them there, I don't know.  I guess I just didn't want to embarrass myself all alone.  I don't know why I wanted to take her roller-skating.  It's a terrible idea, really.  I can't do it; I've never done it.  How I am I supposed to, well, play cool when I'm making a complete fool out of myself?