Funny Stories

My Last Chapter :( Sorry...

I've enjoyed writing these so much! Especially since so many people have been commenting on how much they have liked these. But my time has now come to stop this story since I have forgotten to update it for so long. So this is officially my last chapter of this book, I promise it will be the longest and hopefully the funniest. I may continue my other books, as I have been working on a brand new one that has not been published yet. Thanks so much for all of your support and I wish you the absolute best in your writing and reading careers.

Signing off of this book, 

       Sincerely, TheBeautyInside101

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Now that's what I call stupid: In my junior year of high school, this guy asked me on a date. He rented a Redbox movie and made a pizza. We were watching the movie and the oven beeped so the pizza was done. He looked me dead in the eye and said, "This is the worst part." I then watched this boy open the oven and pull the pizza out with his bare hands, rack and all, screaming at the top of his lungs. We never had a second date.

. The fake report card: I failed the first quarter of a class in middle school, so I made a fake report card. I did this every quarter that year. I forgot that they mail home the end-of-year cards, and my mom got it before I could intercept with my fake. She was PISSED—at the school for their error. The teacher also retired that year and had already thrown out his records, so they had to take my mother's "proof" (the fake ones I made throughout the year) and "correct" the "mistake." I've never told her the truth.

. All the fish: I went to this girl's party the week after she beat the shit out of my friend. While everyone was getting trashed, I went around putting tuna inside all the curtain rods and so like weeks went by and they couldn't figure out why the house smelled like festering death. They caught me through this video where these guys at the party were singing Beyoncé while I was in the background with a can of tuna.

. How to win at video games: When I was little, I would go on Nickelodeon.com all the time and they had this game similar to Club Penguin, except it was called Nicktropolis. And if you forgot your password, a security question you could choose was "What is your eye color?" and if you got it right it'd tell you your password. So I would go to popular locations in Nicktropolis and write down random usernames who were also in those areas, and then I would log out and type in the username as if it were my own and see which of these usernames had a security question set to "What is your eye color?" (Which was most of them, since it was easy and we were all kids). I would then try either brown, blue, or green, and always get in, then I would go to their house and send all of their furniture and decorations to my own accounts. And if I didn't want it, I could sell it for money.

. Drama at my drama class: One time my drama class's teacher had gone home sick so we were just put in a classroom with a movie to entertain us for the period when an alarm went off. None of us were sure if it was the fire alarm or the lockdown alarm, so we all head out into the hall to check and no one's out there, so we head back in and climb under our desks as is lockdown procedure. Cut to an hour or so later when a teacher bursts in and nearly dies of relief because the school was on fire and we were the only students not accounted for and half the faculty and fire department had been searching for us for ages. Literally, the whole school had filled with smoke while we'd kept super safe under our wooden desks.

. I drew a penis with a glue stick on the whiteboard: My whole class once got detention because I drew a penis with a glue stick on the whiteboard and when the teacher went to wipe off the board all the fluff came off and stuck to the glue. I never got in trouble for it because my whole class found it too funny to tell the teacher it was me.