Chapter eleven

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Taehyung's staring competition began again but this time with a wall instead of the ceiling as he sat on the floor with his back pressed against his bed.

He found his phone on his table and now he was twirling it in his hands, wondering if he should call home. He was afraid of what he would hear. Done with thinking, he called, telling himself that he'll deserve whatever is thrown at him.

His heart dropped when no one picked it up. He called three times before putting the phone down. Why won't anyone pick up? Where are they?

He called his sister's phone next and someone answered.

"Eon Jin?"

"Oppa? Thank god you called. It's Appa's funeral today." She informed him, her voice as tired as Taehyung felt.

"Eomma yelled at me when I said you should come too." She whispered, close to crying.

"It's okay, Eon Jin."

"But you have to come! You're the oldest child. Oppa, please! We need you here." She was crying softly now, frustrated at everything happening.

What happened to our beautiful family?

"I can't, you know that. I can't make eomma hate me even more. I won't be able to bear it because I know she won't let me come in."

"I'll help you Oppa! We can sneak you in, it won't be a problem at all!"

Suddenly, there were voices on the other side of phone. Taehyung held his breath when he heard his mother's shouts.

"What did I say to you?! Never contact any of my family again, don't you understand?! You are dead to all of us! Don't you dare come near the funeral or anywhere around my family! You mean nothing to us anymore! Understand?" Her shouting turned to normal gradually  but her voice was still filled with pain, exhaustion and anger.

"Understand?!" She yelled again when Taehyung didn't reply.

"Yes. I understand."

She hung up.

Taehyung put the phone down. He officially just lost his family.

I should feel sad, right?

Yeah, I should be crying right now.

But why aren't there any tears?

I guess everyone is right. I really don't care about anything except myself.

He rubbed his face and went to look in the mirror. He stared at himself.

Why am I not crying?!

He yelled at himself in his mind.

Stop being so selfish, Kim Taehyung. Your father just died, because of you nonetheless, you weakling. The least you could do is cry for him.

Nothing.

He gave a loud humourless laugh after a minute.

How pathetic.

He shook his head and left his room, looking for Yoongi and Namjoon.

He heard music from Suga's studio and both of them talking to each other. He knocked on the door.

Yoongi was about to close the door on his face as soon as he opened it but Namjoon stopped him and looked at Taehyung expectantly.

"It won't happen again. I promise. I'll make sure to be mature and take care of my responsibilities and focus only on Bangtan. I'll work hard and most importantly make sure you don't have to worry about me anymore." Taehyung finished his little speech without any emotions as he looked at the floor.

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