Fearless Mate (Auctioned Mate series book# 2)

Chapter 3: Burden of Truth

“Excuse me?” I looked at him dumbfounded. This man was clearly insane. “I'm not leading anyone anywhere. Come on Myles,” I grabbed Myles's hand and turned to the door.

“Wait,” Daniel said, “at least hear us out first.”

“There's nothing to hear out. You've got the wrong person. I'm no leader,” I spat. All of this leadership talk just bring up old memories, memories I would like to keep suppressed.

“No, we're looking for you,” Daniel squeezed the bridge of his nose. “You are the girl that survived the academy and the legendary Henry Crawford. We heard a lot from some of our female refugees at the academy. They told us all about a Mason Faye who defied all of her officials and helped take down half of the Council.”

“That Mason Faye was stupid. She thought she could do whatever she wanted without consequences. A lot of good that's done for her. She got her friends killed, she was beaten, assaulted,” Myles looked at me when I said that, “threatened and almost killed. She can't help you. She'll only get you killed.”

“We need someone like you. So many of our people are loosing hope. The last rebel attack cost us a lot of lives. People are talking about going to the Council and asking for forgiveness.” I snorted when he said that. The Council would kill them where they stood. “They're losing sight of the reasons why we formed in the first place. For freedom.”

“I'm seventeen, I'm just a kid. How could you ask me to lead your cause?!”

“I—we all believe that you are the right person for this. It's because you keep on fighting. You didn't let the academy or anyone else change you.”

“Yeah, but I barely left there with my sanity. Nothing can take away the nightmares or the pain on my friends faces. I caused that. Nothing can bring back Jillian or fix Angela,” tears trailed down my eyes as I tried to swallow the lump in my throat, “nothing can fix all the deaths that I left in my path. I'm poison,” I wrapped my arms around myself.

“Mason,” Myles pulled me into him, “I thought you handled this? None of that was your fault. You didn't kill your friends, you tried to save them.”

“No,” I stepped out of his arms and shook my head, “death follows me. You almost died Myles. I don't know what I would do if something happened to you. When I was sitting in confinement, I didn't know if you were still alive,” I wiped tears from my eyes as I sobbed.

“I'm here and I'm alive,” he glided his thumb across my cheek, “I'm never going to leave you again.”

“I hate to ruin your sappy moment and all, but there are thing we really need to discuss,” Daniel interjected.

“I told you,” I croaked. “I can't lead you...them.”

Daniel sighed then went back to his desk. He pulled his chair out and sat. His hands rested in the desk as he looked up at Myles and I. He had an indecisive look on his face.

“I'm sure there are more qualified people out there to help you,” I raked my hands through my hair out of frustration.

“Their is no one else,” Daniel said dryly. “You were our last result.”

“Why can't you do it?” Myles asked Daniel.

“Because I'm dying!” Daniel slammed his hands on the desk making me shake a little. “If I could, I would lead them. These are my people. I don't want anything to happen to them. Can I ask something of you Mason?”

“Shoot.”

“All that I ask is that you stay here for a few weeks. Participate in some of our training sessions. If you don't like it and decide that it's not for you then you can leave. Please just give us a chance to show you that we're worth fighting for.”

I honestly didn't know how to answer him. A part of me wanted to tell him 'no' and the other part was curious to see there world underground.

“Fine,” Myles answered for me. “Three weeks, then we decide,” he walked up to Daniel and shook his hand. “Can you show us back to the room Benny?”

“Ah, sure than, see ya Daniel,” he waved and we followed behind him.

“How could you decide that Myles?!” I snapped. “You had no right to answer that for me!” I pushed pass him.

“I'll tell you why I agreed,” he grabbed my arm and pulled me back. Benny continued walking leaving us behind. “We have nowhere to go Mason. We can't go home. We have no food, no money, nothing! When Daniel said to stay I naturally thought that maybe I could keep you safe for a few weeks. You look like you shit like you haven't eaten in days and I listened to your breathing in the room. I think you may have some respirator problems too. They could give you medical care.”

“I don't care,” I shook my head. “We could do just fine out there on our own again.”

“Are you fucking listening to yourself. It's not just about you Mason. I'm tired of moving. I just want a home again. Maybe I was mistaken because I thought you wanted that too.”

“I do, but not with them. We don't know them. We'll find a place of our own. A place where we can raise a family,” I said.

Myles let go of my arm and stared at me. “Really?” he licked his chapped lips, “That's bullshit. I don't even know if you want to mate me let alone raise a family with me one day. I know you felt it when we were in the shower. You knew what I wanted, what I was hoping for so don't give me empty promises.”

“Of course I want to mate you Myles,” I looked away from him, “now is just not a good time. There's no contraception like there use to be in the past. What if I get pregnant? I don't want to bring a baby into this.”

“Don't you get it, there will never be a good time. You have to make the time. I've always been ready. It was you who was scared. Making babies is a part of life Mason. I would have been happen you know that you'd given birth to my child. It wouldn't have been a burden to me. I had hope you'd be ready for it one day.”

“What do you want me to say,” I shrugged, that I'm not scare? Well I am. I'm not ready to bring a baby into this world yet. Every time you want to mate it's like a shard of glass piercing my soul because I know what might happen and it scares me to death.”

“Thanks for being honest,” his brows furrowed and he looked broken. He walked off.

I didn't go after him because nothing could fix that. I've hurt that man in more than one way and he knows it. I've only ever caused him pain. I wanted to crawl under a rock and die. How could I say that to him?

As I stood in the desolate hallway, noises started to erupt in the wall. Only a few dim light-bulbs lit the hall. Benny and Myles were long gone. I was alone again.

I studied the pictures and mirrors on the walls until I saw something. It was there and gone in a flash but I knew it was there. One of the mirrors shook and I stopped and walked back. There was nothing there. I tried to shrug it off but I knew when something wasn't right.

The noises in the walls came again. When I turned to look back in the mirror, I screamed. “Ahhh!” Maggots were everywhere and snakes were crawling out of her eyes. She looked discolored and in so much agony. It was Jillian, no matter how deformed it looked, I knew it was her. I could never forget her face. She died in my arms and I had to see her take her last breath.

I found myself unable to breathe. I kept walking backwards until I hit the wall on the other side. I slid down the wall and wrapped my arms around my legs. I still couldn't breathe. Her image was still in the mirror staring down at me, accusing me. I did this to her.

“I'm so sorry,” I told her. She didn't say anything. “I'm so sorry,” I rocked back and forth.”I'm so sorry.”