Everything's Fine

VI

Trigger Warning

"N-nothing." Peter stuttered. Tons of tiny scars littered his arms.

"These don't look like nothing Pete, what the hell? Do you cut?" Tony's voice slowly rose, until he was yelling. Peter was shaking, his breathing slowly getting faster. 'This can't be happening.'

He heard footsteps running towards him. He hadn't even realized he had collapsed onto the floor, grabbing his hair. He heard people talking, and he felt someone picking him up. Peter's vision started to blur, black spots at the corner of his gaze. Then the world went dark.

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Tony gaped at what he saw. Tons of tiny pink scars were on the boys arm.

"These don't look like nothing Pete, what the hell? Do you cut?" He was yelling at the kid at this point, fear fueling anger. Peter had collapsed onto the ground, hyperventilating. His fists were full of his hair, his knuckles turning white.

Tony heard footsteps behind him, but he was focused on the kid.

"Pete, you need to breathe ok? You're gonna pass out if you keep this up. C'mon, you're gonna be ok. You're just fine." His voice was laced with panic, and he turned to see who had run into the room. "S-Steve." He choked out, clutching his chest.

"I'll take him to the medical bay, ok? Breathe Tony, he's going to be fine." The super solider picked Peter up easily, and ran to the medical bay. Tony sat there, looking at the smeared blood on the floor and flinched. His kid was not ok. He hasn't realized he'd been crying until he wiped his face. He slowly stood up and shakily walked to the medical bay.

He walked in and looked at Bruce and Steve hovering over the boy and talking. "How is he?" Tony croaked.

"He passed out from hyperventilating. He should wake up soon, although you're going to need to be careful. I don't know what happened to get him like this but he should be fine. The cuts on his arm have healed too," Banner replied, not looking up.

"Ok." Tony nodded his head. They hadn't seen the scars. At least there wasn't any fresh ones. Steve walked up to him, putting a hand on his shoulder.

"Take care of him Tony. The kid needs support." Tony just nodded, numb.

He needed to fix this.

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Peter woke up, and groaned. What had happened? Bright white light shone down on him, blinding him. He covered his eyes with his arm, shielding himself from the light. "Pete? Are you awake?" He knew that voice. It was Tony. Peter just sat there, pretending to sleep. He didn't want to talk to his mentor.

"C'mon kid, I know you're awake. We have to talk about what happened." Tony spoke again, sighing after he got no response. "Pete, wake up kid you're giving me grey hair." Still nothing. Peter heard him walk out of the room, sighing in defeat. He heard someone else walk in, his footsteps heavier than Tony's. He knew who it was, it was Steve.

"Steve?" Peter groaned as he sat up, his body sore from laying on a table.

"Morning son, you slept a while." The solider was sitting in a chair next to the boy, staring at him. Peter nodded and looked around the room. He was in the medical bay.

"Where's Bruce?" He liked he scientist, his presence always calming to him. The super solider just shrugged, sighing. "He's probably in his room sleeping, he had a long night."

The Spiderling just frowned, looking at the door. "Can I go to my room?"

"Sure, just be careful." Steve nodded, standing up. The two walked out of the room, to Peter's room. Steve kept walking to the elevator, patting the kid's shoulder as he passed the room. Peter turned to his room and froze in the doorway. Tony sat on his bed, staring at him.

"Peter, we need to talk." He sighed, looking down at his feet.

"A-about what?" He stuttered, his breathing slowly getting faster.

"Calm down. I'm not mad, I'm just worried about you, kid. You're like a son to me, so please, talk to me." Tony looked up at his son, a pleading look on his face.

"Ok. What do you want to know?" Peter mumbled.

"Where did you get the scars on your arm? The left one." Tony asked, gesturing to his arm. He looked at his arm. The many scars ran to his elbow, some lighter than others. He frowned at them. Those were a bad time for him. It wasn't long ago either, it was a few days after the events of homecoming. It only lasted a week, and then he stopped. He had been clean for a month.

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Peter jumped up. He checked the clock, it reading two-twenty five. His heart raced and his eyes darted around the room, wide with fear. He had felt the weight on his chest. He couldn't breath, he couldn't move. He felt tears running down his face, anxiety coursing through him.

'You're fine, you're fine. Absolutely fine. Don't look at it, don't think about it.' Peter tried to breathe normally but couldn't. He looked at the razor. It shined in the moonlight, and Peter could see himself in the reflective surface.

He grabbed the blade with shaky hands, and stared at it. 'No, don't. You can't. Not again.' But he had to. He could feel the dust clogging the throat, and the taste of metal filled his mouth. He didn't even realize that he had done it. He felt the blood dripping down his arm, a fresh set of cuts glistening down to his elbow.

"I-I'm sorry." He whispered, crying. He sat there the rest of the night, crying softly.

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"I, um, cut myself. It was after homecoming, I felt weak and would have panic attacks every other hour, and I needed something to remember I wasn't back at homecoming and that I was in the present." He took a deep breath and felt tears well up in his eyes.

"I-I never meant to." Peter whispered, looking at Tony.

"Ok," Was all the billionaire said. 'He's disappointed in you. You're weak, weak. Absolutely fucking weak. He hates you.'

"You're mad at me, aren't you?" Peter mumbled, and he started crying.

"What? No! I'm just mad at myself for not noticing sooner. That's my job as your mentor to notice things like tha-"

"No! It's not your fault," Peter interrupted.

"How?" Tony asked, looking at his kid.

"I made sure no one would see them. I always wore hoodies and long sleeves, and once they healed I'd use May's makeup and cover them up." He reassured his mentor. Tony looked at him, standing. He walked towards his kid and pulled him into a hug. "Please don't do this to yourself again, kid."

"I won't." Peter lied. He felt himself getting worse by the day. And he wouldn't let himself become a burden to Tony. So lying was his only option.

'I'm sorry Tony...'