The Milkshake Project

Why Do Fools Fall In Love

That Monday, I sat down at an empty table in Human Ethics. Frankly, I was glad Rider hadn't shown up to class that day. I wasn't sure I was ready to face him yet. The weekend went by in a gloomy blur, and Rider's absence only seemed to prolong the inevitable confrontation. After all, we still had a project to do.

I stared blankly at the empty essay.

"And it looks like I'm stuck doing it," I muttered to myself.

As I vacantly tried to spark some ideas, a pair of slender hands rested on the edge of the table in front of me. I followed the hands up to the second face I didn't want to see that day. I tried to keep a straight face as I looked up at Chrissy Donaldson.

"Eleanor, I'm really sorry about what happened," she said, her voice startlingly void of a spiteful flare.

I eyed her carefully. Chrissy's entire demeanor was different. Instead of the prideful, high-and-mighty stance she usually carried herself in, she was slouched over and looking to me like a shameful puppy. It's like someone flipped a switch inside her, and she was genuinely trying to be nice to me.

"and I really, truly am," she continued, "I thought he had told you."

I shook my head, swallowing hard against the lump in my throat.

"At least, he told me he was gonna tell you," she shrugged.

"Why are you telling me this?" I asked her, "Why even bother?"

"I just wanted to tell you," Chrissy mumbled, " He shocked me too. I honestly thought he had chosen you."

She gave me a meek smile and walked away. I watched as she retreated to her desk, her head hung low and arms crossed insecurely across her chest. Suddenly, tears began to burn at my eyes again. I sprang up from my chair and quickly made my way to the front of the classroom.

"Mr. McDaniel, may I use the restroom?" I asked, trying to hold the tears back.

I was not about to cry in front of anybody.

"You may," Mr. McDaniel said as he flipped through a textbook, "Take the pass with you."

I moved to take the plastic hall pass when Mr. McDaniel picked his head up.

"Are you alright, dear?" He asked, looking into my likely-reddened face.

"Yes, sir," I said, as I grabbed the pass and walked out of the classroom.

~

At lunch, I didn't have much of an appetite. I nibbled on a graham cracker as Bonnie and Dusty came to sit with me. Neither said a word throughout most of the lunch period, save for small talk here and there. Sometimes one of them would catch my eye and try to get me to smile, but I just couldn't do it.

"I just don't get it," Bonnie said, breaking the silence, "After everything you told me, I just don't see him doing that."

"Well, he did it," I sighed, "I don't really want to think about it anymore. You said it yourself, he's nothing but a punk."

"I didn't know him. You did. Dusty, can you go get a fork for me?"

As Dusty stood up, Bonnie leaned in closer.

"I didn't want to tell you earlier, but I saw the way he looked at you in the car. When you weren't looking, he was," she whispered, "It's like he made it a priority to see you. To look at you. I don't think I've ever seen something like that, before."

"Yeah, well, he also made it a priority to make out with Chrissy," I retorted, "Jeez! I can only imagine how many other times he's done that before! Who knows? He could've been necking with Darlene Sue from our math class before he showed up at my house. I was nothing more than his side-squeeze, playing second fiddle to God-knows how many other girls."

I sighed as I dropped my head in my hands.

"I just feel like... like I was a fool," I confessed, "and everybody's going to know it."

"Hey," Bonnie said, as Dusty rejoined us, "You're a fool, and we won't let anybody believe otherwise."

"Thank you, Bonnie."

~

The day seemed to drag on and on, and I wanted nothing more than Monday, and the rest of the school year, to be over. Dusty and Bonnie gave me a ride home after school. Though March was coming to a close, a cold snap had sent a frigid chill through the state. I bundled my sweater against myself as I trudged up the porch steps and into the house.

I was absolutely exhausted, both mentally and emotionally. I hardly felt like doing anything anymore, but, at the same time, I didn't want to sit down. I knew that if I stopped my mind would wander, and I was determined to not let that happen. My mother had gone off to run errands, so I had the house to myself for a little while. I decided to keep my mind busy by cleaning up around the house, so at least I would be doing something productive with myself.

I went upstairs to gather dirty clothes to wash when I discovered a plastic bag sitting on my bed. I figured my mother had set it there when she had gotten home from work. I opened the bag and pulled out a decorative box from it, undoing the lacy tie and pulling off the lid. Inside was the Jubilee dress. I sat there and stared at the folded fabric, watching the sunlight from the window dance across the beautiful color. Running a finger along the soft dress, I sighed to myself.

"What am I going to do now?"