Freeze (The Jewel Project #4)

21.2|| Snowballs

Sam didn't know what he'd been expecting, but it was definitely not all the flowers, the rose petals still filling the freshly made bed. They somehow made it real.

"Huh, so there really is no halfassing it with you, is there?" Jessie said taking a step inside, followed by Angie.

Sam stayed in the threshold, feeling like he was intruding even if he'd asked permission.

"Nope," Kyle answered, joining them in.

"It's all about the setup," Kay supplied. "Aslo the geography."

"Geography is no longer an issue," Kyle rectified and Sam was really grateful that he didn't really get what they were saying.

"Where did you find...?" Jimmy started.

"Such a bitch," Kyle replied wisely. He then turned to Kay and quirked an eyebrow. "I think you missed some petals."

"I think you're missing opportunities," she retorted. "What if the storm hadn't stopped?"

"Then I'd be braving it for gas stations."

"Ew, shut up," Tom said raising his hand to block their word flow.

Sam didn't really get why gas stations were yucky, but from Tom's reaction and the way Jimmy rolled his eyes, he gathered there was some innuendo there he'd missed.

"You're just jealous," Kyle said with a grin.

"Jealous?" Jimmy asked, feigning offense. "I'd use a stronger word. Like envious. Or what's even more spiteful than that?"

Jessie giggled, but elbowed him in the ribs. "Shush, you."

"Don't take it as pressure, Jessie. Take it as me giving him the middle finger for showing off."

Jessie laughed harder, but Sam didn't find it funny. He was getting a sick feeling in his stomach like the one he was sure Jerry felt because he wasn't there. He was left behind somewhere in grade school while his brothers were way ahead of him acting... Age appropriate now that he stopped to think about it. He and Jerry were the weirdos.

"What's up?" Tom asked, using his twin superpowers that Sam so desperately seemed to lack.

He shook his head. "Nothing. It's just that... I totally get Jerry."

"I understand Jerry perfectly," Jimmy said, probably using his twin powers as well. "What I don't get is why he's so afraid of normal relationship evolution."

Sam sighed and leaned his elbows on the windowsill, looking out into the snowy grounds.

"There's something else troubling you as well," Tom deadpanned.

"None of you get this fear because none of you are scared," Sam said carefully. " Jerry and I are not...We don't have the self confidence you three have. We have our things that we're good at. Bookish things. But when it comes to fighting, to relationships..." Jerry not so much, but he was a failure. As much as he tried to improve, it never felt like it was enough.

"Thinking you will fail is half-losing," Tom said, grasping his shoulder. "You don't see yourself, but you're doing great. You've improved so much. And trust me, I have doubts. A lot of them. I just ignore them as much I can."

"Tom's right." Angie came to them and cuddled under Tom's arm. "We all look up to you."

"You have no idea how much," Kyle interjected. "I couldn't wait for you to get here and get this leadership mess off me. Even if you're not the best fighter, you fill the spot you're meant to fill."

Sam huffed. He wished he could just accept that and embrace his role. But sometimes, when he couldn't have his team, hero skills were essential.

"You don't get it, do you? Christine's not here. I blew the rescue mission, and now here I am, acting as if she's just in the other room or something--"