Short Story Collection

My Baby

I cried. I cried and cried and cried. I couldn't bear what happened. It felt as if I were dying. I think I am dying. He's gone and I never even got to hold him, hear him cry, I barely saw him for a second yet I loved him more than any other. I felt others around me, I felt their warmth yet, I was still cold. His body was cold, clammy, still coated in blood. I can't bear him that way, it was my fault. It should have been me. Why couldn't it be me? They released me, they let me go home. I felt my body move, yet I did not will it too. I saw myself drive home, it was like I was watching myself, it was just like I was a flicker on a silver screen that someone was watching for their own enjoyment. I watched as I got out of the car and walked inside. I slowly turned on the TV and turned it up loud, as loud as it goes. I walked into the bathroom and turned on the water for a bath. I watched as I turned on the radio, as loud as it could go. My heart ached to hold him close to my chest and never let go. I felt the water soak me and the wet clothes tightly wrap closer towards my wet body. Sharp pain ripped through my body, yet I did not scream or flinch, I just let the red substance seep down my arms until I drifted out of consciousness. The last thing I thought, was my child.