When Light Met Dark // Phan

Three

Phil waited expectantly, his eyes boring into the man sitting opposite him, though nothing about his demeanor gave off confrontational connotations; he was simply leaving the younger man the opportunity to decline the invitation if he so wished.

Dan carefully avoided eye contact, though there was something oddly appealing about meeting his gaze, despite the somewhat unpleasant situation. He weighed his options for a moment; on one hand, Phil had shown immense kindness by letting him into his home, having only exchanged a few words, but on the other hand, there was always the possibility that he could use his weaknesses against him at some point in the future. But did he really care if the latter happened? He'd been so used to rejection and neglect at this point, telling someone might be worth it, even if Phil turned out to be not as nice as he seemed.

Dan dragged his eyes away from the barely touched plate in front of him to look at Phil, who was still waiting patiently, despite being left in silence for a few moments.

"Well," Dan said, setting his fork down, "if you haven't guessed already, I'm not exactly the happiest person." Phil smiled in encouragement now that the conversation was actually going somewhere, and maybe there was a trace of triumph in this gesture. Dan appreciated this man's patience, and how he didn't force anything out of him, but he carried on, now wanting to explain as articulately as possible.

"Last night, I had been kicked out of my dad's house. I packed a bag and left, but after about an hour of walking, it finally sunk in that I had nowhere to go. That's when I came to the conclusion that nobody actually wants me here, and maybe I should end it all." Phil's eyes welled up with sadness, though he tried his best to stop any tears from falling. He didn't want to bring it up right now, but there had been a time, years ago, when he felt the exact same way, that no one would care if he died, but thankfully, he had friends to show him life really was worth living. It was a long road to recovery, but he'd done it, and he wanted to do everything in his power to help Dan get to a good place, too.

"I've always felt like this, it was just, at that moment, I had nothing left to hold on to" Dan continued almost nonchalantly, as if it was unimportant. Phil remembered feeling that way, too.

There was a long silence, but by no means was it awkward; both men were in their own thoughts, Phil processing what had just been said, the other wondering what would happen next.

"Why did your dad kick you out?" Phil asked finally, and Dan was startled back into reality, a frown now clouding his face.

"How open minded are you?" Phil raised his eyebrow slightly at this seemingly random question.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean what are your views on homosexuality?" Phil frowned, though it wasn't at this statement specifically. Had his father kicked his son out over something as trivial as this?

Phil had been with other guys before, years ago, but he hadn't felt the need to get into a relationship as of late. He hadn't really met anyone he clicked with in that way.

"Well it's a bit difficult to hate a minority I'm part of." That's one way of coming out to someone he'd met only the night before. Dan looked startled, yet slightly pleased for a moment before carrying on with his story.

"I don't know why I did it, but I told my dad I'm gay. I think it was just a spur of the moment thing," he laughed weakly, "he said something like 'why can't you ever park the car straight', and I was like, 'because I'm not'. Didn't go down well, evidently." He talked as if it was a joke, which infuriated Phil somewhat; this was his life they were talking about.

Phil didn't know how to respond; he had never been in a situation even similar to Dan's, so he doubted anything he said could make it better. Phil was lucky enough to have accepting parents, even if it did come as a shock at first.