andante ❈ benjamin pavard

EIGHT

Zoe forgot how much she liked dressing up. Not to go to work, or go out to a bar or a party or anything like that. But dressing up purely to look nice. Not to impress anyone else or live up to someone else's rules. She admired herself in the bathroom mirror once more before leaving. She was wearing a spaghetti strapped blue floral dress that ended mid thigh and white platformed sandals. She had finally managed to tame her hair, and it rested along her back in soft waves. All in all, she was pleased with her look.

She stepped out of the bathroom and saw Ben messing around on his phone. She leaned against the doorway, striking a pose.

"So, what do you think?"

Ben looked up, and a look that Zoe couldn't quite decipher crossed his features. She shifted self consciously. God, why did she even ask that? Why did she even care what he thought? It wasn't like she'd change or anything if he didn't like it, and it's not like he'd be rude and say if he truly didn't like it either, so why did she even bother? A million self deprecating thoughts ran through Zoe's head as she awaited a response from Ben.

"I think you look... nice."

Nice. Okay, Zoe could work with that. Not quite gorgeous, breathtaking, out of this world, but not as bad as disgusting, ugly, like the gum on the bottom on my shoe. Zoe could work with nice. She had to remind herself that she wasn't dressing to impress anyone other than herself, and she liked the way she looked. But it wouldn't exactly hurt if Ben liked the way she looked as well.

Ugh, she could feel herself starting to like him more and more and they had only spent what? Twelve hours together? It was exactly what Margot said she would, and she didn't want to give Margot the satisfaction of being right. So instead of lamenting on Ben's choice of words, Zoe stood up taller and gave him a small, reassuring smile and headed towards the door.

She began to wonder what Margot was up to. If she had gone back to Lille like she said she would. Oh God, she was probably worried sick. Zoe didn't have her phone so it wasn't like she would be able to tell anyone where she was, and she was drunk out of her mind when she left the party, so it wasn't like she told anyone who she was leaving with or where she was leaving to.

"Hey," Zoe began as she opened the door with Ben behind her. "Does anyone know I'm with you?"

"Why are you asking?"

Zoe shrugged. "I don't know. I don't want anyone to be worried. It would suck if I went home and there were missing posters everywhere."

That comment resulted in a laugh from Ben, and Zoe was reminded how she really couldn't get enough of that sound. There really was nothing like the feeling of making someone you care about laugh. Especially if that person had a pretty laugh like Ben. Pretty boy, pretty laugh. Snap out of it, Zoe thought to herself. Don't let Margot be right.

"Well, no one's asked about you."

Zoe frowned. She'd been gone a long time without communicating with any of her family or friends. She was in Paris without anyone knowing. When she was younger, her parents forced her to text them her location every thirty minutes if she was out with friends. Her parents still expect her to call or text them when she gets home every night, and now no one's been asking if anyone's seen her? It didn't make sense, but then again, her life didn't make sense.

"Really?"

"Yeah. And even if they did, I'd tell them that I hadn't seen you."

"Really?" Zoe asked, pressing the elevator button.

"Well, your brother is super over protective. He'd kill any guy, but especially me, if you went off on a random road trip with them."

"No, he isn't." Zoe rolled her eyes as they stepped into the elevator. Mathieu was anything but over protective.

Zoe loved him, because above all else, he was her brother, but he also acted like she didn't exist. He'd constantly ignore her, pretend she wasn't there, and ordered her not to speak if he had any company over. He had since grown out of those habits, and started acting like a real brother, but that was after he moved to Monaco to work at a fancy hotel.

"Yes, he is." Ben scoffed. "Why do you think you haven't had a boyfriend?"

Zoe was taken aback by the question. "How do you know I haven't had a boyfriend?"

"Trust me, with Mathieu around, there's no way." Ben shifted, avoiding eye contact.

"I haven't had a boyfriend yet because I'm waiting for the right guy, not because of Mathieu."

Ben tilted his head as he said, "Yeah, and why do you think the right guy hasn't come around yet? Because Mathieu scared them off before they even had a chance to talk to you. Mathieu is more popular around Maubeuge than you think."

Zoe narrowed her eyes. "Why especially you?"

"Huh?" It was Ben's turn to be taken aback. "What do you mean?"

"You said he wouldn't want me to go on a road trip with any guy, but especially you. Why you?"

Ben blushed a bright red, as he stammered, "Like I said, we went through your diary."

Zoe punched him in the arm, lightly. "Oh, don't flatter yourself, asshole," Zoe said, even though Ben was completely right. She was still crushing on him like she was when she was twelve years old and he left for Lille.

Margot would be right if Zoe fell for him, but Zoe could prove her wrong in another way. Ben could be Zoe's Prince Charming. He was the perfect gentlemen. Although Zoe didn't remember much from Noelle's party, she remembered sleazy Jacques and the way he wouldn't let go of her until Ben took it upon himself to rescue her, and refused to let him out of his sight. He carried her bags and paid for everything, and insisted on Zoe spending more time with him when she could've easily been gone hours ago.

That had to mean something.

No one could do those things for another person just for the good of their heart. No one was that nice. Ben had to feel something for Zoe, she was positive. She could feel it in her bones.

They reached the lobby of the hotel, covered in marble with a glass ceiling. Zoe craned her neck backwards to look at herself. They'd make a nice couple, she observed, as they walked side by side. Their heights complemented each other's. Her pin straight hair contrasted his wild mane of curls. Her eyes popped against his. It was almost like fate. It at least felt like it.

Margot was wrong. Mathieu was wrong. Zoe didn't need protecting from Ben, or from any one. She knew how she felt for Ben all those years ago, and she knew how she felt now. She liked him, and Ben would be lying if he said he didn't like her back.

It was a big step for Zoe to arrive to that realization, even though they had only spent twelve hours together. Feelings were attached to a person, not a clock. It didn't matter if they had spent twelve hours or twelve years together, Zoe would still feel the same way because it would always be Ben no matter what. It was like a giant weight was lifted off of her chest, and she could finally breathe again. She didn't need to fight Margot over it, and she didn't need to confess about it to her diary. The person she needed to tell was right next to her.

"Ben," Zoe started.

"Yeah?" He responded, turning his head to look at her.

She looked back at him, and it was like the sun was purposefully trying to make him appear as an angel with a soft glow and a literal halo. Was there a way that someone that thoughtful, caring, funny, and all around beautiful could like her back? Zoe was sure that Ben was right for her, but was she right for him? He was an attractive, rich, and famous athlete who surely had beautiful model like girls lining up in order to be with him. There was no way he would ever settle for Zoe, the most ordinary girl to ever exist. She wasn't interesting, she wasn't that beautiful when you really looked, and she probably didn't match up to any of the girls that had tried to be with Ben. She would always be Mathieu's little sister to him. Maybe he was that nice.

So Zoe looked back at him, a rue smile on her face, and said:

"Never mind."

**

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