andante ❈ benjamin pavard

TEN

        After finishing their food at the restaurant, Zoe decided that she wanted to walk around the city without the intention of buying things. She just wanted to drink Paris in without an ulterior motive. Ben and Zoe walked side by side, arms swinging, hands brushing. It was fairly intimate, but Zoe didn't want to say or do anything to ruin the moment, so she left it alone.

"Hey," Zoe started. "I have to ask you something."

"What?" 

"How did it feel? Scoring that goal?"

Color rushed to Ben's cheek and he dropped his head, laughing quietly to himself. Zoe watched his actions with a slight smile, and nudged him half heartedly. 

"What? You've probably gotten that a lot, but I'm genuinely curious."

She remembered being at a viewing party in Lille when the goal was scored. Her, Margot, Gabin, and Gabin's friend Daniel were all packed like sardines in the plaza. When the ball soared into the net, Daniel sloshed his beer all over Zoe's new France jersey, with Zizou's name written across the back for good luck. He had tried to kiss her to 'make up for it', but it obviously didn't work. When watching the goal, she never would've thought she would be spending her weekend with him a month later.

"It's not that it's a cliche question," Ben said. "It's just I don't think about football when I'm with you. Like, when you asked that, I completely blanked on what you were talking about."

Zoe tilted her head and responded, "Wasn't that the biggest moment of your life?"

"For sure, yeah. Usually it's all I think about- football is usually all I think about. And it's great, sure, but it can also be draining. As much as I think about my goal, I think about the mistake I made that lead to Argentina taking the lead, which made my equalizer such a big deal. So, it's a zero sum game, really. But now, I don't know, my mind is... quieter. I don't think about it as much," Ben rambled. He sheepishly rubbed the nape of his neck as they stopped at the curb, waiting to cross a cobblestone street. Zoe leaned up and bumped her shoulder into his, reassuringly.

"Well, I'm glad," Zoe said. "What do you think about now?"

Ben glanced down at her, and looked away, before saying, "Doesn't matter."

Zoe narrowed her eyes at him. He did that type of thing a lot, Zoe had come to realize. He'd say or do things that made Zoe think he was talking about her, but instead left her on the edge of her seat or worse, reveal that it wasn't actually about her. She just wanted answers. She didn't want Margot to be right. There was nothing worse than an angry Margot that was right. Just because Zoe knew how to handle Margot didn't make her any less scary.

After walking down the winding streets of Paris, making small conversation and generally taking in their surroundings, they found themselves at a small ice cream parlor off the beaten path. Ben had gotten a basic chocolate cone while Zoe got herself mint chocolate chip. It was an acquired taste.

"I can't believe you like that," Ben said as they sat down on the stools that faced the window, overlooking the passerbys.

"Why do you care what goes in my mouth?" Zoe asked, raising a single eyebrow. Ben laughed hysterically, and ended up getting bits of vanilla ice cream around his lips.

"Don't ever say that again," Ben said when he finally regained composure. Zoe scrunched her nose at his reaction. She didn't even mean for it to come out the way that it did, and she didn't realize that Ben would react the way he did. But she liked seeing the immature side of him. Not the overly romantic, suave, confident side. It made him seem more real. Less dreamy. 

"You are such a boy." Zoe grabbed a few napkins from the dispenser. "Speaking of mouths, you have ice cream, like, all over yours." She handed him the napkins, and watched as he completely failed getting any of it off of his face. Classic men. They were so useless.

"Did I get it?"

"No." 

He tried again.

"Now?"

"No," Zoe said, exasperatedly. Ben made a face and tried once more, still failing. Rolling her eyes, Zoe grabbed the napkins from Ben's hand, and dabbed at the spots herself, leaning closer to his face. It felt weird to be that close to Ben. She noticed the little beauty marks that decorated his face, the prominence of his cheekbones, how long his eyelashes truly were. "There."

"Thank you." Ben watched as Zoe threw the napkins in the garbage.

"No problem. I love doing charity work."

Ben smiled widely, feeding himself more ice cream, and thankfully it not getting on his face.

"It's still so weird seeing you all grown up."

Zoe rolled her eyes. "Okay, grandpa."

"I'm serious!" Ben finished the last of his ice cream. "Back then you were having all those problems with Juliette Henry--"

"Oh, God. Here we go."

"And you had the huge fight with Margot--"

"She stole my favorite sweater!"

"And you absolutely hated Mathieu--"

"No, Mathieu hated me."

If Zoe was right about anything, it was that. She didn't want to repeat herself, but if she was right about anything, it was that. Mathieu hated her when they were younger. He ignored her constantly, would leave school without her, threatened her if she talked to any of his friends, and generally was not a pleasant person. 

"No." Ben shook his head. "Mathieu adored you. Well, he still does."

"That's not how I remember it," Zoe pointed out.

Ben gave her a half shrug, half smile, combination, and said, "You remember a lot of things differently."

"You are so cryptic," Zoe said, shaking her head slowly. 

"It's apart of my charm." Ben paused. "But I'm being honest. You're more confident in yourself, even if you don't think so. I can see it. It's very... becoming of you."

"Becoming? Scratch grandpa, more like ancient celestial being. Did you know Socrates personally or what?"

Ben let Zoe's snide remarks roll off of his back like they were nothing, which they truly were. It would be more alarming if Zoe was overly nice and generous to him. It meant something that Zoe was comfortable around him. She didn't take in people easily, but Ben didn't know that. She was so comfortable that it just seemed natural to him. 

"Thanks, I guess." Zoe tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear.

"Don't thank me for the truth." Ben shrugged.

"Thanks for sharing the truth, then," Zoe amended, fighting the small smile that was battling its way onto her lips. 

After a few moments, she finally let the smile win. Ben instantly smiled back in response, and Zoe wondered how she could've ever thought, even for a second, that she was over him. 

**

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