Imagine #1 (Part II)

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√Requested by @ ruhiafreen31

Zayn's POV

Sometimes I just can't control myself. I know. I know Harry so damn much well. And I also know that he thinks of (Y/N) as nothing but his little sister that he never had.

But still, my insecurities kicked in. I thought she was cheating on me. With him. I should've known better than that.

This is all Laura's fault. She was my... she is my first love. I loved her with all of me. She was my crush since god knows what grade and I couldn't even muster up the courage to look in her direction, worrying what if she caught me looking at her.

One day Liam, my best friend, pushed me towards her and told me to man up and just ask her out. I reluctantly did what he said, and though the nerves in my brain were screaming 'alert', I somehow mustered up my courage to ask her on a date.

And when she said yes, I felt as if I was on cloud nine. I chuckled bitterly at the memory. Oh how silly I was. Everytime we would be together, watching movies or just doing homework, I would always find her texting someone or busy on a call.

I never thought that she might be talking to another guy, with way she would talk. It seemed as if she was talking to her brother or some friend, because whenever I used to ask who was it she would say just the same. And I believed her. I fucking believed her.

Then one day Liam told me how he saw her kissing some guy in the changing room. I didn't believed him. He dragged me to the changing room and I saw her kissing some asshole with my own eyes.

My fists clenched at the memory.

It's my fault that (Y/N) left me. I always thought of her as Laura. I always used to think that she would leave me just like Laura did.

I don't know how I started mistaking (Y/N) with that bitch. That fucking whore Laura.

I held my face in my hands. This is so hurting. How could I ever say those things to (Y/N)? I called her so mean names. But I didn't meant to. Ugh what have I done? I didn't meant a thing I said to her. I think I just channalized my anger towards Laura on her.

How can I be so fucking stupid?

She hates me now. (Y/N) fucking hates me.

I don't deserve her. I don't deserve her love. I'm such an asshole. She deserves so much better than a dickhead like me.

Oh God. I must've hurt her so bad. She might be wishing that I come running towards her and apologize to her and make everything alright.

But the wound's been done. No matter how much I try to tame the cut and heal it, it'll always be there. There would always be a mark on her heart of this day.

This is it.

I want to destroy all her hopes of getting us back together. She needs to move on and find someone better than me.

And there's only one way to do that.

I kill myself.

.

.

.

.

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Sorry no sorry! Please don't kill me okay!?

I hope you enjoyed this.

Remember y'all are beautiful and that I'm always there for you.

Love you and lads a lot. Xoxo

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