CHAPTER 34

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(Somewhere Only We Know- Keane)

Clouds POV

Everyone went to go find Edward but I needed to check back in Chandler's room if I could find anything else.

Slowly making my way to the room, making sure not to get caught by teachers or staff, I got to his door and saw police tape covering the door. Way to make it subtle. I took them off and opened the door.

I flinched seeing books, bed covers, frames, and blood all over the floor.

I whimpered and stepped in the room and closed the door behind me.

Staring at the blood flash backs came and I grabbed my head trying to get them to go away.

"H-HELP, NO!" I heard Chandler's screams and I cried

"STOP NO!" more and more screams and horrid pictures flooded my mind

"No! No! Stop! Get out of my head!" I screamed out loud

I shook my head and blinked repeatedly to focus of something. That's when I spotted a small leather journal on the ground.

I picked it up and saw it was tied together by just a leather band tied in the front. My curiosity lead me to untie it. Flipping to the first page, they were lyrics. . full written songs.

I was amazed. I read what seemed like the song that chandler was singing, Stomach Tied In Knots.

The more I read them the more I felt horrible, all these songs seemed as if they were about us. The troubles we went through, the sadness we went through. I sighed closing the book and holding it against my chest.

Staring at his bed I remembered the night I found out Lilly was dead. He brought me back here and hugged me all night. He told me he loved me.

And I broke his heart. I did that. I lost the one person who really cared about me.

I'm so sorry, Chandler.

Chandlers POV

I stood staring at my motion less body. How could this even happen. I remember Clouds scarred face,

I sighed running a hand through my hair. I stopped at looked at my hands, blood was splattered all over them.

Enough is enough, walking to my body, I grabbed my own hand and squeezed it.

"Wake up. You need to wake up and find Clouds. You need to tell her."

Nothing.

I sighed and let go of my hand. If I die here, I want Clouds by my side. And only her.

The door opened and I saw a nurse and-

Clouds!

I walked up to her and tried to touch her face, but I stopped. She can't feel me, she can't even see me.

Tears streamed down her face but she ignored them.

She sat next to my bed and I saw she held my journal. I went wide eyed and sat next her.

(Boston- Augustana)

Clouds POV

I stared at Chandlers cold body and thanked the nurse. She left and I was left alone with Chandler in the cold room.

"hi," I whispered.

"I read your journal, I hope you don't mind, but I think I have to say Alone Together and Stomach Tied in Knots are my favorite, " I cracked a smile but it soon faded away

"Please don't go, I want to be selfish,  I want you here. I miss your laugh, your bright blue eyes, and your smug attitude. I miss you,"

"I'm so sorry, this is all my fault, I can't live without thinking of how bad I hurt you. I'm sorry I'm so fussy about needing you. Without you, I'm not strong.. I'm sorry it took me forever to notice," I grabbed his hand and squeezed it

Getting up from my seat, I placed a kiss on his forehead and placed my other hand on his cheek.

"Please, if you can hear me, wake up," I said slowly

Chandlers POV

She stayed there whispering things to my life less body and I screamed at my self.

"Wake up! She needs you! Wake up god damn it!" I yelled at my body

"I've lost so many people, please, if you go, I'll go.." she whispered

I suddenly felt nauseous,  she wasn't,  no.. she wouldn't go that far for me. I can't- I won't let her go that far to kill her self for me.

I loved her too much to see her go through all that pain. Losing her boyfriend, Lilly, and me.. I'm not going any where.

Not Yet.

(Chasing Cars-

Clouds POV

I kissed his head once more and squeezed his hand. I was about to let go, but I felt his hand grip mine, I gasped and saw our hands interlock.

"Ch-chandler?" I choked out.

No response, I sighed knowing it was probably just some nerve reaction.

Tears came down, but I shook my head. Wiping them away I let go of his hand and walked to the door.

"C-Claudia" a whisper was heard

I stopped and slowly turned around.

Chandlers once closed eyed shined bright blue. His familiar blue orbs looked at me and I gasped.

"oh my god," I whispered

"Nurse! Nurse! Doctor! " I yelled searching for any one who worked at the hospital.

The nurse who guided me to the room was talking to a Doctor and I grabbed her hand and dragged her to Chandlers room.

"He's awake! He's awake!" I yelled as we got to the room and she gasped and ran to him checking him out on the monitor.

"h-hey" I giggled as happy tears fell down my rosy cheeks.

He turned to me and smiled. He reached out to me and happily grabbed his hand. "I love you" I whispered kissing his knuckles

He blinked at me and smiled. "I love you."

"You're going to be okay," I said happily

"you should wake up." he croaked out

"what?" I asked confused

"wake up" I suddenly felt my body being shook around and I gasped waking up.

I looked around and saw I was in Chandlers room, on his bed, and Brittany at my side.

"it was fake." I whispered

"Are you okay?" she asked me, I shook my head and busted into tears.

All of my dream was fake, he never woke up, he never gripped my hand, he never woke up.

Brittany sat next to me and rubbed my back. She told me reassuring things but I knew it was all fake. I was going to lose Chandler and I know it.

He was going to die.

All because of me. Grayson would lose a brother because of me. William was going to lose a son because of me. Sam was going to lose a brother because of me.

The world was going to lose Chandler beacuse of me.

(so so so sorry this has taken me forever.. but I've been so busy and all.. what I'm gonna do is make three long chapters and after the last one I'm assuming the story will end. again I'm so sorry and I know I'm such a lousy writer.. love you guys)

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