Being With A Jock

Chapter 11

Christmas - Allegedly the special time of the year. Unfortunately for me, it isn't special as I want it to be. Just here on my bed in my house, resting my back on the wooden backboard with a leg hanging off and the other stretched out while my head pressured on against the board. What a fun Christmas this is.

We already did the usual, where the family gets together to rip open their presents and be surprised for what they received from someone. I didn't expect this day for us as a family to be pleasant enough to survive, but it us. Tori got what she wanted; a make-up kit, new shoes and clothes, new purse with the them being rouge, and a new phone. She switched from a blackberry to a blackberry torch. Even Shane received what he wanted; two new pairs of shoes and hoodies, one fitted hat and a snapback, a new PlayStation 3 and a new TV. For Allison, she got a new stylish backpack, with new shoes, a phone - an iPhone - new stylish clothes and concert tickets to Demi Lovato and Drake. I, for one, received new varsity jackets, new shoes and clothes of course, a new car surprisingly - which Tori can have my previous car which she was excited about. And new limited edition comic books, even the rarest of the rare. I was utterly shocked that they found such things for me, they still knew me even only a little bit.

What we all received was money, and a new laptop for each of us. My father and mother are still my parents, Shane, Tori, Allison and I promised to get them something for their anniversary because we didn't get them anything for Christmas. They assisted that we didn't, but it was our pleasure to do it anyways.

Strangely enough, my father has been trying to settle in with the fact that both his masculine sons are gay. He's been trying his hardest to be more understanding. More closer to his kids than being one of those distant fathers that the kids are suppose to despise. He's feel out of touch, and that's the first phase of being a distant despised father, so he wants nothing untold to him. Yesterday,Christmas Eve, we had a talk that involved Thomas and he wanted to know the truth. He even gave me something to think about, something to not keep me miserable about myself. I forgave him because of that.

Being a loner in my room on Christmas Eve isn't all that bad, except that constant silence baring through the room. . . Maybe it is, but I gotta move on. Thomas surely moved on, getting comfortable with Andrew, he doesn't need me in his life. He said it himself. On top of that, he switched seats, so he doesn't sit beside me in Science, English and Math. Ironically, Andrew is in all three of those classes. Thomas now sits beside him. I can see him by the corner of my eye giving me devious grins. Ugh! I just wanna-

*Knock Knock*

"Uh, son? Can I come in?" My father asked, patiently waiting for my answer.

"Sure, dad." Depression was notable in my voice as I answered softly.

He swayed the door open, walking towards the bed. I bring my knee up for him to have space to sit on the edge of my bed. "You OK? You can tell me anything. I promise I won't judge you." Not sure if I can trust him. "Is it about Thomas?" I remained silent, still not feeling good enough to share anything with my father. "Please, Chance. Trust your father for once."

For a brief moment, I remained silent before I begun. "It feels weird without Thomas being with me, my guy. I don't expect you to understand this whole gay relationship thing."

"A gay relationship is similar to a straight one. We don't need to use labels between us anymore. I'm trying to understand and be more helpful towards my two sons and their love lives. And I still have to apologize to Thomas for what I did."

"That's gonna be hard considering Thomas moved on and doesn't want to talk to me anymore." Hard words to speak, feeling at a loss of breath trying to say them.

"Are you sure Thomas moved on?"

"He told me himself." Just in different words.

"His lips may have told you, but what did his eyes say?" His eyes? "Think about, son." Leaving my room with a helpful smirk at me.

What did Thomas's eyes say? My father actually gave me something to congigate about. Knowing that I'm gay, he still helped nevertheless. Maybe my father is understanding who his true son is all about, well half, I'm still not the correct Chance just yet.

"Dad!" I called out to him.

He rushed into my room. "Yeah?"

"I'm sorry."I-"

"No, I'm sorry. I should've been more understanding."

"I forgive you."

I keep thinking about what my father said, did Thomas's eyes confess something his lips didn't? It occurs in my mind frequently. Well of course it does. Do I still have a chance with Thomas? Ariel and Andrew are in the way, spreading lies that may as well be the truth. I don't even know right now, my mind is all hazy in this situation.

"How you holding up, Chance?" Lifting my curiously to notice Tori who popped her head in my room.

"Okay." Answering calmly.

"You sure?"

"Can I ask you something?" It's the only way to know for sure if what Andrew said was true or a big lie to irritate my nerves.

"Sure." Strolling in, seating her ass fully on my bed with her legs crossed.

"Thomas shares things with you, right?"

"Of course, we're best friends. Why?"

"How is he?"

"Good. But depressed."

"Why?"

"Because he misses you. Wants you back."

"Then why wouldn't he say anything?" It doesn't make sense. Not even comprehensible.

"He wants to figure out his feelings about you which been growing, but he also wants you to express yourself, express your feelings. He thinks you only want him back because you've screwed up and just someone to bang. He's only doing this to draw out your feelings and figure out his own. Maybe you want him back because you just want a boyfriend."

"No, that's not the reason."

"Yeah, you just want your reputation to gradually increase." Don't irritate me, Tori.

That's not it, Tori."

"It is, as well as you just want to be a jerk, have sex with him and cheat on later." She's crossing the line.

"No!" I snapped.

"Then what is it?!"

"I want him back because I love him. Not for the sex, reputation or to even think of him of cheating on him. I love Thomas, he makes me feel special, something I never felt before when I was with Anthony. Making me feel like a man inside and out. I feel like I can be my smart-ass comic book nerd self. I've never been that around Anthony or my jock friends. Thomas is special to me, rare to me. Someone who comes once in a lifetime. My shy prince. I love Thomas, Tori, love him a lot."

"Then you should tell him that, only when the times right. My job here is done. Phew, that was easy." Tori left me with a smile, a sly one, before leaving my room like a hoe.

Tori set it up for me to express my true feelings I have for Thomas. She knew, she knew that I love Thomas. My heart confessed something my mind wanted to deny. Waiting for the right time to get Thomas back will make me impatient. I gotta get pass Ariel, Andrew and their conniving, manipulating ways.

But first, I gotta know something. Tori will know the truth. "Tori!" Calling out to her.

She popped her head in my room. "Yeah?"

"Did Thomas and Andrew ever kiss?"

"No. When he talked to you, he wanted you to kiss him, to prove your feelings."

"Did Thomas and Andrew ever give each other blowjobs?"

"Ha, no."

"Then they never had sex?"

"Ha, you're kidding, right?" No, not at all. Does my expression seem like I'm kidding around, Tori? "No, Chance. Thomas still never had sex with a guy yet. He's not ready, but he does want you to be his first when he's ready. Don't over congigate things." She exited my room once again.

Son of a bitch. Andrew lied to me to irritate me. To push me far enough to the point where I lose control. He's only doing this to create drama between us, feeling that Thomas doesn't want me anymore. Same with Ariel, they're trying to manipulate me, my mind, my heart, forcing me in denial about what's best for Thomas. Andrew's trying to steal my ex with Ariel assisting him where as I will be trying to gain Thomas's love and get him back.

It really isn't going to be easy.Thomas wants me to express my feelings for him where as Ariel and her bastard of a cousin, Andrew, will try to take him away from me. If I believe their deceiving words coming from their lips, I'll get caught up in their little game. I'm a pawn to them, easily manipulable. Is that even a word? Whatever, it doesn't matter right now. What matters is getting Thomas to be my guy once more. No screw ups, Chance. Remember that.