I'm Real (B.A. x E.H.)

six

Brandon looked around at the group, unsurprised by the shocked looks on everyone's faces. He took a weird satisfaction in it. He definitely had no problem revealing who he was to the group, but he realized that this was the moment when everyone else would reveal who they truly are.

Across from him, Edwin sat unmoving. Was this his chance to come out? Edwin didn't think so. Something about it felt wrong, like he was taking away from Brandon's moment. So he continued to sit, unmoving, waiting for the rest of the guys to make their move.

It was Austin who cracked first, smiling widely. "Of course this applies to guys. This applies to everyone, since, ya know, not everyone is either a girl or a guy."

Nick nodded slowly. "Yeah exactly. It doesn't matter who you're having over. We should just have a protocol for everyone."

Zion, like Edwin, sat silently. Edwin wondered if Zion was quiet for the same reason he was, or because of the exact opposite. It didn't seem to matter though, because Brandon clapped his hands together once, rubbing his palms together.

"Perfect. So now that that's out of the way," Brandon began with a smile. "I vote for the sock on the door method."

[—]

Brandon's admission was still on Edwin's mind as decided to go for a swim later that evening. It was still his day off, so Edwin thought he should enjoy himself.

He dove head first into the cool water, not caring about the slight splash he created. He did a few laps in the pool, first freestyle, then a flip turn thrust him into back stroke. Edwin's history with swimming was another thing he had yet to share with his bandmates, but it was simply because he didn't think it was relevant.

Edwin was in the pool until the sun disappeared behind the horizon, instantly making the water colder. So he lifted himself out, shook his hair of the excess water, and wrapped a towel around his tired shoulders. He moved to go inside, but was blocked by a tan figure.

Zion looked conflicted, completely unmoving in Edwin's path. Edwin was about to ask him what was up, or why he wouldn't let him through. But Zion just pushed forward, closing the door behind himself so that the two were left outside.

"Zion, you okay buddy?" Edwin raised an eyebrow in confusion.

"Why did you look at Brandon like that?"

Edwin was even more confused. "Look at Brandon like what?"

"When he came out. You just looked at him in...I don't know. It was a way that I'm not sure I'm comfortable with."

Edwin's stomach hit the floor. His secret was out. He couldn't control his own expression, something his mother scolded him for endlessly, and now everyone knew he was gay. Edwin swallowed thickly, quickly deciding that denial was the way to go.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

Zion rolled his eyes, running his fingers through the beginnings of dreadlocks. "Ed, man, I saw you. The look on your face was just...Are you homophobic? Because where I come from, homophobes get beat the fuck up. And I'd really like to not beat your ass. I like you a lot, man, but if it comes down to it, hatred is not the wave."

Edwin was stunned into silence. Him? Homophobic? The thought was almost laughable.

"Z, I'm not homophobic."

"Well don't deny it now, just because I threatened to beat your ass."

Edwin chuckled slightly, unable to contain it anymore. "I'm serious. I'm not homophobic. It's honestly the opposite."

"Holy shit," Zion's eyes widened in shock. "You're gay?! Are you and Brandon gonna fuck?"

"Zion, really? Not all gay or bi or pan people want to fuck. That's like saying all straight people want to fuck each other. But also, you cannot tell anyone."

Zion looked confused. "Are you not out yet?"

"Not to the guys. And I want to come out on my own time," Edwin sighed.

Once again, Zion ran a hand through his barely-there dreads. Edwin instantly regretted his decision. It wasn't that he didn't trust his bandmates, but it was more of the fact that he didn't know what it meant for the future of the house.

One queer person in the band was fine, risky at most. But two queer people, that was drama. He was sure that the house would be buzzing with pressures for him and Brandon to hook up, or even date (not that Edwin minded that thought).  And if that kind of information got out to the general public, that would be the end of the band.

"So you don't want me to set you and Brandon up?" Zion asked.

"No," Edwin said, even though deep down, all he wanted was to be with Brandon.

"Well that kind of sucks."

Edwin didn't stop himself from chuckling at the taller boy's genuine disappointment. "It does. But like I said, Zion, this is our secret."

Zion nodded, albeit a little disappointedly. "Got it. As far as I know, you're straight."

"Well don't say that..."

"Too far?"

"A little bit."