Ugh [Peter Parker]

Just Imagine..

Imagine growing up in a world where everyone has a soulmate- everyone is meant to be with someone. Imagine getting to watch everyone around you figure out what their tie is to their soulmate. Tattoos, timers, and red strings were the most popular, but they weren't the only ones. There were others like, seeing in black and white until you meet your soulmate or seeing only their favorite color- these ones that made it harder to find your soulmate. Imagine having none of these for all of your life. No string, no tattoo, nothing. Then someone mentions the pain tie- the rarest of all the soulmate ties. Imagine hoping to whoever might be up there that you had this tie- that you had something- someone. Imagine trying so hard to look for signs- doing subtle things like hitting your toe somewhere or being risky in hopes the injury you get might cause your soulmate to strike back.

Imagine nothing happening- being told that the only way to know if this tie was yours is if you felt some immense pain you know you didn't cause. It doesn't matter how old or young you are- just imagine it. Imagine feeling this alone- imagine seeing the sad numb faces of people around you with no tie to anyone. Now, imagine you thinking that that would be your life. That you'd never have a love like you saw in some couples on the streets or on TV.

For a moment, imagine being Peter.

For fifteen- damn near sixteen years- his entire life- he thought he was going to be alone. Then one day- out of the blue, he feels something. An intense burning on his tongue and throat- it shocks him so bad he damn near falls. Was that it- was that the sign? He hoped it was- but he has no time to dwell on it. He's swinging around and someone throws something his way. His web snaps and he's falling, chest scraping on the floor- something else is thrown at him- it's heavy and hard and it damn near crushes his leg- but he can't think about that. He hears a shrill cry from afar and despite the ache in his leg, he has to get up to help. So he does- he does and you're there, huddled up in a ball. He feels something- but he doesn't know what yet. He asks if you're alright.

"Uh- yeah. I just- my soulmates uh- he's stupid and uhm- I don't need help. I'm- I'm good.", you tell him and his heart stops. His whole world stops- no- you couldn't be-

"Oh- you have that kinda tie too? I mean- you sure you're not hurt?", he asks. He wants you to answer the first question- but that would be crazy. His luck couldn't be that great, right?

You ask him if he's okay then, and he just brushes it off, letting it slip that his soulmate hurt him as well. Something flashes in your eyes and hope flutters in his heart. He doesn't even know you- not yet- but he just wants a soulmate so badly. He wants to know that he'll have a love like his Aunt and Uncle had- he wants to be that happy- wants to grow old with somebody. He wants to be loved.

You punch the wall- he's shocked. He's shocked because why would you do that? Because oh god he feels the pain. He feels it- he feels you.

"You..", you murmured. He repeats your word and then you're throwing something at him- then you're yelling and at last you're running. You're running from him- and there goes his luck. Of course his soulmate would be like this- of course you'd run from him.

Of course you didn't want him.

Yes- he'd heard you. You shattered his heart into tiny little pieces- you didn't want him- and you said so, but he acted like he couldn't hear. It wouldn't count if he hadn't heard, right? Maybe you'd change your mind- maybe you wouldn't break him like this. Maybe he wouldn't go the rest of his life thinking he was a mistake. He'd already thought so before he met you- and now he would think it even more after you left him. He'd been picked on for his lack of a soulmate- for his scrawny body and nerdy type ways. Society poked and prodded at him- breaking his self-esteem with each and every push and shove. As they happened- as the mean words were slung his way, he didn't think much of them. They didn't hurt as bad- but now that he thought of it, now that he felt all of them piled up all at once- it hurt. Your words- they hurt. Why didn't you want him? There had to be more to it than just his alter-ego. He was scared of putting those he loved in danger too- but he had to do it. He was given these powers for a reason. They gave him abilities he could only dream of- but he never dreamed they'd make his soulmate not want him.

Was that the price of this life? The loss of you?

How cruel of the universe. Hadn't he paid his price already? Was his beloved Uncles life not enough?

He guessed not- maybe he deserved this. Maybe this was his karma for letting his Uncle die- for letting his Aunt lose her world. Maybe just maybe.

He deserved this- he deserved that hard hit to his chest. He deserved to have the wind knocked out of him- to have that blade slash through his side and make him bleed out. He deserved to fall and crash into an empty alleyway- but did you? No- you didn't, and that was probably why you didn't want him. You didn't deserve to feel his pain, did you? No. You didn't deserve this ache- and yet he was reaching for you anyway. Just his luck- he crashed right next to you, a copper taste filling his mouth as his fingers reached for you, tugging the fabric of your shirt. You started screaming again and he found himself smiling bitterly beneath his mask. Was that all he was good for? Hurting you?

Then it hit him. You were right.

You weren't meant for this life- you were just unfortunately thrown into it. You were part of his karma. He didn't deserve you- but he deserved to lose you. That's what you were meant for, right? He was meant to think you didn't exist for sometime, and then just suddenly meet you. He was meant to feel such immense hope- and then have it be broken by you. You weren't meant to be with him or love him.

You were meant to break him- and so you did.

"God- you idiot.", you whispered, pulling him further into the alley, and that was all he heard before darkness consumed him.