toxic love // brandon arreaga

chapter two

that day, edwin stayed over at my house and didnt go back to the PRETTYMUCH House, I know i should tell someone but i just can't.

we woke up about 7 o'clock just in time for me and ed to get ready for school. he kept saying positive shit, and to be honest it made me feel good, i actually felt like facing everyone and telling them to go fuck off, i mean they dont need to know if its true, no one knows, no one but the snake.

we jumped on a uber to school beacause we are lazy shits like that, we jumped out and i saw malu and zion in between a make out session on the field, it hurt knowing that he's so in love and that he is too blind to see malu's plans. i turned a blind eye to them and went to greet the rest of my boyssss, i love them and they always make my day, how lucky am i to have such people. 

i got  through class without any distractions and when someone asked me if what happened in the party was true, i would reply with a full chest that it was all bullshit. in the middle of english malu walks in with zion looked all roughed up and clearly they were up to something, the whole class was shooketh, it was well and truly an awkward silence, zion sat his black ass in his chair next to me and didn't say word, mainly because i didnt let him, i would never let him live past the day that he made out with malu in school, just before lesson and didnt even clean themselves up. zion eventually spoke up and asked abou how me and char was doing, i replied saying that its hard keeping a long distance relationship but in the end it would be worth it, she's been my shoulder but ever since she left, i've been keeping it all to myself, i've never trusted anyone like i trust char, lyrics came to my head again "when will i trust again, when will i love again" 

the final bell rang and i made my way to the school carpark, we get special clearance just incase someone spotted us on the streets and would potentially find out where we live and where we study at, me and zion walked together but by the time i got to the car park, zion was nowhere to be seen, after about 5 minutes, the rest of the gang arrive, lit as fuck, nick and austin busting out their moves and edwin serving the vocals, we were all waiting for the uber to come to take us to the studio, we be cooking up some bangers for the beanz, we were all there apart from zion and we could all guess why he wasnt there, we called him and he didnt pick up, at the end he eventually picked up and clearly wasnt in the position to come to the studio as we hear malu in the background, nick turns off the call in disbelief, "he's one dirty motherfucker that's for sure". everyone laughed, nick was always the heart and sole of the band, lets say he's the dopey one. 

we got to the studio and just goofed about, hypothetically we couldn't do anything without zion beacuse we lowkey need his vocals, i whipped out my phone and started writing some lyrics, i got that feeling again, words repeating in my head "gonna try to fix my life, gonna fight to survive, ain't gonna listen to the lies" 

what was i writing ???