Our Sunshine (BTS Yoongi Little Space)

Chapter One- Stressed

Well, here is the first chapter of this series! Let me know what you guys think. Hope you enjoy!

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"Damn it!" Yoongi exclaimed as he slammed his fist down against his desk. Once again he had played out a beat of a song and once again it had sounded like shit. After being in his studio all this time he still couldn't get it right. He had the beat in his head, it was floating there as if mocking him that he was unable to produce it correctly.

Yoongi glared at the computer screen in front of him projecting all his anger onto it. Why couldn't this stupid piece of technology extract the song from his mind and make it appear on the screen? Technology had advanced his much, why couldn't it read his mind? If it did, then he wouldn't be having this problem!

Running a hand through his hair, Yoongi sighed. As much as he wanted to blame the computer he knew he couldn't. The computer only did what it was told and Yoongi just kept hitting the wrong keys.

Why couldn't he do anything right? No matter how much he tried and no matter what he did, he just couldn't get anything done.

Soon enough, Yoongi felt a prickling feeling in his eyes as his frustration grew. Realizing this though he quickly shook his head refusing to cry. No. He couldn't cry. If he started to cry then he was sure he would slip. It's not that he didn't want to. No one knew how much he wanted to. He needed to, but he couldn't, not yet at least. He needed to finish this song.

His eyes shifted over to the small brown box that was on the highest shelf of his cabinet. It sat there, calling him. As is obeying he got up from his seat, wincing from the soreness of his muscles and walked over to the cabinet. Pulling over a nearby chair, he stood up and reached his hand up until his fingers brushed over the cardboard box. Gripping it tightly he brought it down and opened the lid.

Inside were the objects that always put him at ease and relax. There inside were a soft grey cat plushy, a folded up Kumamon blanket, a coloring book, some crayons, and lastly a light blue pacifier.

Yoongi always kept the box in his studio because it was the only place he had the most privacy. If he kept it in the dorm either Jin-hyung or anyone else would have found it. By having it here in the studio he would be alone and be able to slip without anyone finding out. He didn't know how the members would react if they found out. What if they thought he was a freak?

Yoongi groaned annoyed. It was bad enough he was stressing over the song, but now he was stressing over everyone's reaction.

Taking a breath Yoongi pushed the latter thought aside. As long as they didn't find out he didn't have to worry. Instead he focused on the song and was once again facing his initial dilemma. He knew he needed to finish the song because if not it would drive him to insanity. But, another part of him told him it would be a good idea to slip. If he slipped he would relax and would later be refreshed and start working on the song again, but this time with a clear head. Yoongi being the stubborn person he was however, preferred to beat himself up and finish the song, and afterwards slip and relax without a care in the world.

"Ugh! If I could've finished the damn song already I wouldn't be having this problem! Why am I so fucking useless?!"

At that moment, there was a buzzing noise and Yoongi turned his head toward his desk again. Walking over he saw his phone screen flashing and once again groaned in annoyance before answering.

"What?!" He yelled, still holding the box by his side. There was a chuckle on the other end of the call.

"Well, hello to you too Yoongi-ah." Jin's voice replied.

"What do you want hyung?" Yoongi sighed. He really wasn't in the mood to talk, not with his inner headspace battle. There was a sigh.

"Yoongi you've been at your studio for three days without coming home. I think I have the right to call you."

"It has not been three days."

"Yes, it has."

Yoongi looked down at the corner of his computer screen and was surprised to see his hyung was right. It really has been three days. For him though it only felt like a few hours. He frowned. It's been three days and not a few hours as he thought and even still he was not able to complete the song. He really was useless.

"Yoongi-ah? You still there?"

Hearing Jin's voice the younger was brought back from his thoughts but was still disappointed in himself.

"Y-Yeah." He answered his voice cracking. At realizing that he bit his lip. No. He told himself he wouldn't cry.

"Yoongi, are you okay?"

"I'm fine."

"But-"

"I said I'm fine. Is that all you wanted to tell me?" He asked eager to hang up. He felt the tears rolling down his cheeks and he now knew he was going to slip and he really didn't want Jin talking on the phone while in his headspace.

"The boys and I are going out to eat tonight, and we wanted to know if you'll come with us." Jin answered desperately wanting the other to agree. It would be good for him to get out of his studio for a while.

"Thanks, but no thanks hyung. You guys enjoy." Just as he was ready to hang up, he heard the protests.

"Please Yoongi! You've been locked up in your studio for days, and we're worried. I know you're dedicated to your work, but you need to take of yourself! Come with us because I'm sure you haven't eaten a proper meal these past days. I tried giving you your space, but it's time to come home!"

The tears rolled down his cheeks even faster now. He was making his hyung worry, and all because he couldn't finish the song.

"L-Like I said. You g-guys enjoy." With that he hung up and began to cry even more. He sat down on the floor, setting the box beside him, and hugged his knees to his chest.

"Y-Yoongi d-don't do nothing right! Y-Yoongi make lots mistakes!" The Little wrapped his Kumamon blanket around himself and hugged his plushy close. "W-Why Y-Yoongi bad at everything?" At this point the Little was a crying mess hugging his knees closer to his chest as if to disappear from the world.