Selfishness in Silence

Play Nice

Ben's lightsaber captures her attention for the umpteenth time as they fly in silence, her mind traveling back to the last moments before they'd left the room on Cloud City. After his confession about Luke, Ben had gone to the workbench, taken the cracked kyber crystal and seated himself in the center of the room, legs folded beneath him and hands resting on his knees. His palms faced the ceiling with the crystal resting in his right hand.

It caught the light from the window, winking red.

For a long time, the world around them was utterly silent, Ben's eyes closed and his brow furrowed in concentration. Then, with a shocked exhale the crystal levitated above his palm, a soft rose glow illuminating his face. Rey stepped closer, enrapt, as he fell deeper into mediation, the tension of his body melting away and an alluring calmness radiating from him.

The pinkish hue of the crystal was changing, paling. Her eyes grew wide with amazement as she watched. Lighter and lighter it grew, illuminating the rift within the crystal. It looked like...

A scar.

The crystal is a mirror of him, she'd thought.

Afterward, he rose slowly and reassembled his weapon, not bothered by Rey as she hovered around his shoulder. She hadn't asked, but...

"Ask Rey." Ben's voice jolts her from the memory.

She smiles awkwardly, feeling like a meddlesome child. Nibbling at her lip, she whispers. "What did you do?"

He smirks as he stares out at the stars. "I purified my crystal."

She waits for him to explain further; he doesn't.

.

.

Maz stands at the rubble of her old home as Rey and Ben approach, evidence of the once great castle cutting gargantuan shadows across the landscape. Behind them, the sun kisses the horizon, bleeding gold and fire across the sky. Ben slows, his shoulders stiff and brittle as he meets Maz's probing stare. Rey ignores their silent exchange and steps up to Maz who turns her shrewd eyes on her, the goggles magnifying them to an uncomfortable size.

"The Rebellion?" Rey asks.

Maz nods. "They are safe. For now." Her gaze flickers again to Ben before focusing back on Rey. "I'm happy to see you're safe as well."

"For now." Rey mirrors.

Maz smiles. "You've held hope for this long." She removes her goggles and beckons for Rey's hand to which Rey gives her. "It would be a shame to give up now." Maz then glances behind her. "Find your way home, have you, Ben Solo?" she sniffs. "He said you'd be stubborn, like your mother."

Ben remains silent, but Rey catches the minuscule flare of his nostrils, the almost invisible tightening of his jaw.

'He said you'd be stubborn, like your mother.'

Luke, Rey's mind whispers and familiar words brush her senses. Peace and purpose.

Maz releases her hand. "Come. Time is not a luxury we have."

Rey seeks out Ben's gaze. His eyes are naked, vulnerable, with all the look of an animal prepared to flee and her heart squeezes at the sight. He appears so awkward, so lost in this moment. The mask of Kylo Ren stripped away, the choices of that half self laid bare. This new path before him is a terrifying set of uncontrolled possibilities. A complete unknown.

She smiles reassuringly at him and follows after Maz.

He could walk away, right now. He could run. Her own steps are solid beneath her. She'd be hurt, she'd be angry, but she wouldn't hold him back. She will allow him the choice... as she had in the throne room.