Poison And Wine (BeChloe)

Chapter 10: Just So You Know

I stand by Chloe's side as she holds on to my hand. We wait for Stan as he walks from the A Cinderella Story themed gazebo. Yes, Aubrey, Jesse, and I made sure it looks exactly like the one in the movie. When Chloe told me this flower garden is her favorite spot in Barden because it looks like a fairytale, I required myself to watch the movie. Even for someone like me who according to The Captain's words is 'too alternative' finds that enchanted gazebo

romantic, and so I told Aubrey that it's what I want this night to be. For Stan and Chloe.

Stan is all smiles as he meets us up at the entrance. Chloe has the same blissful expression, and it's only right for me to sneer at them. With Chloe's white dress and Stan's fancy suit and tie, I feel like this is a wedding as I hand her over to my brother, and I hand her over whole- heartedly. Yes, this time, whole-heartedly.

I stand right there as they both make their way to the gazebo. As soon as they reach the center, the surround sound system that Jesse and I installed earlier automatically plays a familiar song to everyone but holds some sort of a sentimental value only to me and Chloe - a rendition of the song Wonderwall by Ed Sheeran. As the intro plays, my brother smiles at Chloe and asks her to dance with him. Chloe smiles back at him as she takes his hand.

"Today is gonna be the day

That they're gonna throw it back to you."

But upon realizing the song playing, from a far, I watch as Chloe's face falls and turns to look at me. Stan follows her gaze, and then tells her something, probably that I was the one who

chose the song.

"By now you should've somehow

Realized what you gotta do

I don't believe that anybody

Feels the way I do about you now"

Her eyes tell me that she wants me to answer why. Of all the songs, why do I have to choose that song, our song? And so I respond to her with the best smile I can followed by a nod. Slowly, she turns her eyes away from mine and holds on to Stan.

"Backbeat the word is on the street

That the fire in your heart is out."

I just wish Chloe got the message, this rare smile on my face and the nod I gave her - that I love her but tonight I decided I'm going to let these feelings go, gradually. Not just for me, but for Chloe. It's totally unfair to her if I keep lying. Hence, letting her dance with my brother to our song is the first step to ending this madness, and I wish this sights right here would simply numb the feelings away.

"And I'm sure you've heard it all before

But you never really had a doubt

Well, I don't believe that anybody feels

The way I do about you now."

Being in love with Chloe is so much worth it, but I've thought this through. I'm still staying, but I'm also tired of getting hurt. That's why I'm letting her go. This is the end of the line. Tonight is the last night that I get to love Chloe Beale more than I have loved anybody else. Tomorrow, I plan to look at her and for the first time since, I am not going to feel a single loving feeling anymore.

"And all the roads we have to walk are winding

And all the lights that lead the way are blinding

There are many things that I would like to say to you

But I don't know how."

But she gives me that one last look. I don't know what that look means exactly, but I feel like it embodies feelings that are more significant than words could ever convey.