i dont know why I feel this way all the time.
i hate it, i hate it, i hate it!
This feeling makes me not want to have a care in the world... but the person i am still cares.
I wonder if people feel the way i feel.
Emotionless.
Rude.
Tired.
Upset.
Frustrated.
Sad.
And i can go on.
But the thing that's missing is :
Happiness.
I dont truly have it yet.
I want to find it now.
I dont want to wait for something that will just come randomly, but i dont want to find happiness knowing that's it's going to be crushed anyways.
So, i stop/stopped trying.
People might say its alright to feel this way.
Its not.
Hurting others is just not me when I'm in this kind of state.
So, I push others away knowing that if i let them in, they're going to hurt me, so i stop trying.
I really wish I had an explanation of why I'm writing this when I'm not really a writer but its just...
Unexplainable.
