To Steal A Kiss (ereri)

Chapter Four

"Hey...Levi?"

I saw Petra's arm linked with his. They looked like a perfectly natural pair. Something I should be happy for.

"Hi," was all he said before he walked by me into the dorms with the redhead.

He was all dressed up so I'm guessing they came back from their date or something. Ahh, their lovely beach date. They're practically a old married couple by now if they do that.

Quickly following behind the two, I stuck my hands in the front pockets of my sweats. Trying to act all calm despite the fire of jealously burning inside of me.

"So," I said causing Petra to look back and smile. "What'd ya guys do?"

Levi whispered something to her, but Petra dismissed him instantly. "We just had lunch and walked around. Nothing too fancy."

"Ooh, I'm surprised." Don't you just love sarcasm? "Levi didn't take you somewhere fancy?"

I let out a small laugh only be to be cut off by him.

"Just shut your damn mouth. We can eat where we want."

Petra's mouth hung open like it was insulting her. Her arm unlinked with his as she stared at him in disbelief.

"Levi!" She spoke like a mother scolding her son. "Isn't he your friend. Don't be such a dick."

I could hear him let out distressing sigh before placing both hands on his hips. "Well maybe I want to be a dick."

With a scoff, Petra walked off out of the door. She head was held up, not even bothering looking back at her knight in shining armor. Not even a hug, a kiss, or even a look goodbye. The tension grew within the room. It was as if the ceiling was caving in beneath us as I tried to ignore the elephant in the room. 

Letting out a whistle, I turned on my heels to face his livid covered expression. An innocent smile was all I gave him as I skipped up the stairs to our room. The grin was sewed to me face while turning the corner. 

Seeing Levi mad is like heroin to me.

I heard him call my name raining with anger, but I paid no attention to it. He called a second time which was followed by a series of footsteps behind me. His stomping grew louder up the stairs only to stop when he grabbed my forearm.

"What fucking game are you playing?" His eyes locked with mine. Not an ounce of guilt was felt on his face.

"Game?" I played dumb obviously. 

"Don't play stupid," his hand squeezed with pressure. "Are you still hung up on that mistake?"

"Mistake...?" My grin faded just like the hope inside my lungs. 

I could feel his nails breaking my skin under his grip. Like a noose, my throat held me begging to let the tears go.

"That night." He paused to take a breath. "Was a mistake."

In that moment, I knew he was the lucky one. He didn't feel the pain plaguing my heart. With blood filled with sorrow, a knife of hatred stabbed me. 

My body felt weak and pale. That's all. Nothing else. Like the hollow shell I was made of flooded with heartbreak. The feeling of being unloved by someone you love dearly is one of the worst feelings of all. 

"Oh." It came out as a faint whisper. "S-sorry Levi."

Hiding the cries behind a smile, I watched as he let go. My hand grabbed the railing of the staircase trying my best to walk on legs that were made of glass. I didn't hear him say a word. It occurred to me that he wasn't hurt at all. I was the piece of dust that he finally wiped off his shoulder.

And now, we'll be back to our normal lives. Ignoring the past and only looking for tomorrow.

The blurry vision surrounding me finally cleared when landing at the foot of the dorm room. I knew he wouldn't settle into bed after the hell that broke loose seconds ago. So I scrambled looking for the keys to the door and headed in.

The room was the same except for myself. Like my body was here, but my mind was somewhere else. Wandering through the clouds hoping that this was all a nightmare. How they begged to wake up, but the only thing I could see was the messy floor and vague memories of yesterday.

Throwing my body onto my bed, my heart melted through the sheets sizzling like acid. What he said played like a broken record in my brain. The same word over and over and over again. 

"Mistake." I turned to stare at the ceiling fan. "That's what he said."

My back curled to the side hugging the pillow laying beside me. The daylight is supposed to give joy to the world, but only lets me see that all the darkness is now inside of me. He voice burns holes in brain eating away at the dopamine. I drowned myself in tears while squeezing the dear pillow next to me.

It was only then when I realized that yesterday he had lit a match to my heart only to have it burn out the next morning. 

Stuck in this ghost town, his words still haunted me.  

"I don't have the energy to keep pretending I'm happy."

~~~

hi.

long time, no see.

please read.

im sorry for not updating. things haven't been too good. ive been in the hospital for a bit. dealing with depression, anxiety, self-harm, suicidal intentions, and anorexia. im still in treatment but it's now iop (intensive out patient). for the past few months, my joy for ereri writing decreased and i kept lying saying that i'll write more. im sorry. as many of you know, mental illnesses aren't fun. they are nowhere near fun. so for any of you struggling, please message me. and i mean it. please do so and ill be there. you can ask for my feedback or just want me to listen. but please message me if needed.

thank you if you read. and trust me, i will try to update as much as i can.